Sexual censorship in America.

[fraroc]

It has gotten out of hand. America has nothing bad to say about blood, guts, vivisection, dismemberment on TV. But anything had has to do with sex and the naked body, especially the male naked body is either a sin/vile/disgusting/unlawful.

Seriously, America is supposed to be about FREEDOM of EXPRESSION. Those tight, prudish government officials hate the thought of that type of stuff.

Sex is a fucking INSTINCT, no matter what gender or wether or wether not causes reproduction, but American media views it as nothing more as an awful, disgusting, inhumane thing.

[SimsLover50]

To a certain extent I agree. I notice this most in books. An author will have no problem displaying the most awful type of torture, death or whatnot, but when it comes to shagging between consenting adults the authors act like someone's maiden aunt and dance primly around the topic. I don't think things need to be overly graphic, but I think the fade to black stuff- is really silly, especailly if a romance is central part of the storyline and more especially if other adult themes are present.

Since I'm an adult, I don't like my reading or tv censored.. I realize that teens and adults pick up novels too and this is why there are novels written for children and young adults.

[whiterider]

I'm not convinced that that is the case. There's a hell of a lot of sexual content in American media - ranging from ads like this (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_wSClrCf7mCc/SwtWthfys6I/AAAAAAAAACE/2Lu7v4lqp58/s1600/tomford.GQ2.jpg) (not porn but also NSFW, though note the reasonably good photoshop job of removing the girl's nipples and areolae), to reality shows like America's Next Top Model, to fiction like True Blood which is pornographic at times.

Perhaps the sexual content receives more complaints and more criticism than other adult content, but that doesn't seem to have actually resulted in any reduction of it.

[fraroc]

And in a semi-related issue, this is also affecting NON sex things. Like superheroes. Notice how most modern day super heroes don't wear tights anymore or wear their underwear outside?. In this age of extreme censorship, most Americans belive that a guy in brightly colored tights might be (*GASP) a HOMOSEXUAL!!! AAAAUUUGH A HOMO!!! give me a fucking break. I watched Superman and X-men cartoons when I was a kid and they were still all wearing brightly colored spandex. (the 80s and 90s were when EVERY superhero wore either spandex or something very revealing example: He-Man) It didn't do ANYTHING to me. It didn't "magicallly turn me gay"


Seriously, nowadays superheroes (2000-onward) wear either leather or street clothes, if that isn't a result of some kind of censorship, then I don't know what is.....


With all these ultra-prudish, Calvinist, puritan ideas, it seems America is becoming less and less free every day.

[Mistermook]

I don't have any problem finding porn in the US?

[fraroc]

I don't have any problem finding porn in the US?

Porn and stripping is all underground stuff. I'm talking about your everyday life.

[SuicidiaParasidia]

personally, while i do think it is heavily censored.... i think most would agree that only the sexually repressed really want to see it displayed publicly.
a person who has a healthy outlook on sexual activity is not perturbed by the sight/reference of it, but might also understand that its quite private, in an intimate, valuable way for a lot of people (who dont want to feel prodded into sharing these feelings with others), and others sometimes just plain dont want it shoved into their face.

as someone who swings between having very little sexual desire and none at all, i often find it annoying how often movies in particular deem it absolutely necessary to include some type of romance/sexual imagery. as if you could not possibly have a decent audience without flashing some breasts or the introduction of some exceedingly graphic oral gymnastics. yawn--get on with it, already! i want to witness the thrilling conclusion, not an orgasm.

if i WANTED to watch porn, i would look for it in the privacy of my own home. while i dont have anything against sex itself, or the people who enjoy it, i dont actually want to have to see it where im trying to focus on something else, and i just plain do not care very much about how special and wonderful and how much joe and jane down the street (or jane and jessica, or joe and jim) think it is. its sex. it neither deserves glorification nor tarnishing.
(but then, when have people ever been able to just leave something alone? oh, the drama.)

and maybe if the attitude toward sex werent so hush-hush and taboo, people would be more comfortable in their own bedrooms and not feel the need to project their frustrations on my damn movie screen/in my damn book/video game/(insert alternative media here). *grumble*

[Mistermook]

Porn and stripping is all underground stuff. I'm talking about your everyday life.
I don't have problems finding strippers and porn in my everyday life much either.

[SimsLover50]

And in a semi-related issue, this is also affecting NON sex things. Like superheroes. Notice how most modern day super heroes don't wear tights anymore or wear their underwear outside?. In this age of extreme censorship, most Americans belive that a guy in brightly colored tights might be (*GASP) a HOMOSEXUAL!!! AAAAUUUGH A HOMO!!! give me a fucking break. I watched Superman and X-men cartoons when I was a kid and they were still all wearing brightly colored spandex. (the 80s and 90s were when EVERY superhero wore either spandex or something very revealing example: He-Man) It didn't do ANYTHING to me. It didn't "magicallly turn me gay"


Seriously, nowadays superheroes (2000-onward) wear either leather or street clothes, if that isn't a result of some kind of censorship, then I don't know what is.....


With all these ultra-prudish, Calvinist, puritan ideas, it seems America is becoming less and less free every day.

I think the trend in super hero dress really has more to do with the trend towards bad-ass superheros which started as a backlash after the vietnam war. Characters like Wolverine became popular, and sort of stuck. People no longer wanted super heros with traditional clothing but embraced the street fighter look.

Personally super hero- especially heroine clothing seems more skimpy than it used to be. Especially with companies like wildstorm which produce cheese-cakey titles.

As far as equating spandex wearing supes with being gay, I do not see a lot of evidence of this. I do see a lot of dislike of the traditional which in the immature mind is considered being square and not likeable. So flashy superhero outfits are 'your dad's super hero costumes.

Todays youth is immature and likes the 'darkety dark' gangbanger look on their heroes. Anything that is flashy or not in line with that is consdiered less than ideal.

Sad, but hopefully, we'll see an upswing of the traditional once people become bored with the streetfighter stuff.

[Robodl95]

It's my understanding that Europe is much more uptight about violence.I don't find our tv to be very restricting. I've seen naked breasts in movies and too many bed scenes to count. Is it really necessary to see them in the act? And about the spandex, the hero trend in the last decade has been normal people fighting crime. The costumed, batcave type is slightly outdated. We are behind Europe, but that's not a bad thing.

[SimsLover50]

personally, while i do think it is heavily censored.... i think most would agree that only the sexually repressed really want to see it displayed publicly.*

Hmm. Not sure I agree with you on that. I personally wouldn't mind a bit more realistic depiction of adult relationships in fiction, as I feel the lack of it, makes the story seem... Repressed. Especially in books geared towards adults.

Do I want more sexual depictions of people in media? I would like a balance. Right now the sexualizaton seems more gearaed towards women, and not nearly enough of men in my opinion .

[Mistermook]

Again though, I'm just not seeing the problem. I can turn on the television or flip on the computer or even my phone and get plenty of dick and boobs if I'm so inclined. It's not hiding. Sometimes it's even a little difficult to keep away from. Sure, there are repressed, prudish idiots in the country, but they're obviously losing the culture war just like all the other culture conservatives. They act out sometimes with reactionary righteousness, but ultimately it's dick and boobs that win.

And some of the things I've heard described as prudishness are more about safety and hygiene. I don't want a stripper scraping her naked vagina across every strip club patron's dirty leg and then sharing it with mine. I don't want the sort of potential communicable disease issues about them getting too close, when they might have been close to a LOT of people. But I'm in tune with such things, I had a moment in my life where I bounced for a strip club. The dancers want money more than they care for their common sense sometimes, lap dance bans/distance requirements aren't about patrons or prudishness (or at least completely), but protecting young women from the potential pitfalls of their working environment.

[ElementMK]

Notice how most modern day super heroes don't wear tights anymore or wear their underwear outside?. In this age of extreme censorship, most Americans belive that a guy in brightly colored tights might be (*GASP) a HOMOSEXUAL!!! AAAAUUUGH A HOMO!!! give me a fucking break. I watched Superman and X-men cartoons when I was a kid and they were still all wearing brightly colored spandex. (the 80s and 90s were when EVERY superhero wore either spandex or something very revealing example: He-Man) it didn't do ANYTHING to me. It didn't "magicallly turn me gay"


Seriously, nowadays superheroes (2000-onward) wear either leather or street clothes, if that isn't a result of some kind of censorship, then I don't know what is.....You're reading too much into this. Modern superheroes wear street clothing because audiences want to be able to relate to superheroes more than they wanted to in the past, not because there's a new profound horror of Teh Gay. Everyday clothing is just a piece of the patchwork of modern cinema characters. Besides, those tight tights are seen as an impractical symbol from past generations.

Porn and stripping is all underground stuff. I'm talking about your everyday life.LIES. Every Google search has a porn counterpart.

"Population of French-speakers" -> "Population of French-speaking pornstars"
"Local McDonalds" -> "People boning at a local McDonalds"

@whiterider: The longer I look at that image, the more horrified I become.

[Mistermook]

@whiterider: The longer I look at that image, the more horrified I become.
And yet it's strangely compelling. This is what Barbie would look like, if I were having sex with her while she did something strange with bottles between her breasts... It's like a half-remembered fantasy from when I was 11, come to life with uneasy consequences. Is it hot? I'm not sure. I'll probably have to look at it another ten times or so to be sure.

;)

[missy harries]

I can't speak about the US being in the UK but we have a 'Watershed (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watershed_%28television%29)', basically up untill 9pm its kid freindly so after hours all the adult entertainment comes out.
Apparently the US equivalent starts at 10pm so if you watch late night TV I'm sure you'd find all sorts!
I don't watch TV, but some of my best TV moments come from 3am when I was working nights, you just can't beat some late night trash ;)

[crocobaura]

It has gotten out of hand. America has nothing bad to say about blood, guts, vivisection, dismemberment on TV. But anything had has to do with sex and the naked body, especially the male naked body is either a sin/vile/disgusting/unlawful.

Seriously, America is supposed to be about FREEDOM of EXPRESSION. Those tight, prudish government officials hate the thought of that type of stuff.

Sex is a fucking INSTINCT, no matter what gender or wether or wether not causes reproduction, but American media views it as nothing more as an awful, disgusting, inhumane thing.


Actually male naked body (front view especially) is something that you'll rearely see on TV. It has to do with the fact that women are not that inclined to appreciate opposite sex nakedness as much as men do. So you get mostly naked ladies on the screen. Even in porn. Also, America is not really about freedom of expression, in fact it's the opposite. People can't express themselves for fear of saying something that will possibly hurt the feelings or beliefs of others and then they will get sued for millions of pounds as compensation. People are just not tolerant enough. That's why you see people fined for wearing a way too revealing bikini at the beach. :wtf:

[whiterider]

I disagree. Women may be expected to be less interested in nakedness than men, but I've never actually seen anything to indicate that that's how things work in the real world. I see my female friends going on about <insert attractive actor's name here> being naked in x show or film, much more often than I see my male friends do the same.

[missy harries]

The truth is naked men are gross..... Don't get me wrong I like a bit of cock if it's dangled in front of me but your average naked man has chicken legs and some gibletts dangling in between them!
I've never noticed a lack of nude men in the media though since I don't pay attention to TV but you obviously havn't watched Euro Trash, there is German sausage aplenty!

[SimsLover50]

I'm a woman, and the lack of beefcake on tv, is obvious and a double standard. If we have to see so much skinny female cheescake, the least producers can do is show a few men once in a while. Also, total double-standard on actors vs.. actresses atractiveness level as actors can be unfit, balding, and downright ugly and still have jobs, while all women must have implants, and plastic surgerye to work in the industry.

I also disagree that females aren't into looking at the male form. I love the male form, and always have. Much rather look at a men than women. The body is beautiful and should be celebrated. And it doesn't need to be in a porny way.

I am an american, and they just don't show dudes in the altogether except on HBO. i don't say I want porn, per se. but I think the natural depiction of the human body is ok by me. If its a scene where a normal human would be naked then depict them that way. Nudity need not b porn or exploitive. I think I'm more into demystifying the human body than in sexualizing it.

[maxon]

Also, total double-standard on actors vs.. actresses attractiveness level as actors can be unfit, balding, and downright ugly and still have jobs, while all women must have implants, and plastic surgery to work in the industry.
Nevermind still have jobs, they still get the romantic lead roles. The number of films where I've gone 'ugh' in the romantic scene ...

[missy harries]

I'm a woman, and the lack of beefcake on tv, is obvious and a double standard. If we have to see so much skinny female cheescake, the least producers can do is show a few men once in a while. Also, total double-standard on actors vs.. actresses atractiveness level as actors can be unfit, balding, and downright ugly and still have jobs, while all women must have implants, and plastic surgerye to work in the industry.

I also disagree that females aren't into looking at the male form. I love the male form, and always have. Much rather look at a men than women. The body is beautiful and should be celebrated. And it doesn't need to be in a porny way.

I am an american, and they just don't show dudes in the altogether except on HBO. i don't say I want porn, per se. but I think the natural depiction of the human body is ok by me. If its a scene where a normal human would be naked then depict them that way. Nudity need not b porn or exploitive. I think I'm more into demystifying the human body than in sexualizing it.

Your right, nudity doesn't have to be sexual and its sad that TV censorship would rather show violence over nudity (because of course seeing a naked man is much more harmful than seeing someone beaten to a pulp *sarcy*). Very few people are uncomfortable about nudity though and it is seen as something shameful to be covered, it's attitudes that need to change about it, mabey if more nudity was shown in a tasteful non sexual manner it would increase peoples comfort about it (there may even be less snigering in art classes).

[SimsLover50]

I think some sects of abrahamic-based religions are very paranoid about Porn. To the extent that they consider anything nude = erotic or potentially so. This is just a bit silly. Being comfortable in your own skin is something we had centuries before religion decided the human animal was 'dirty' or 'sinful' while even partially nudity.

The hoopla over women breastfeeding is an example of prudity taken to a new extreme.

I'm not advocating people go around nekkid, just that there should be more acceptance that there is nothing inherrantly evil or pornographic about the state, and natural depictions of such is not neccessarily erotic.

[fraroc]

I'm a woman, and the lack of beefcake on tv, is obvious and a double standard. If we have to see so much skinny female cheescake, the least producers can do is show a few men once in a while. Also, total double-standard on actors vs.. actresses atractiveness level as actors can be unfit, balding, and downright ugly and still have jobs, while all women must have implants, and plastic surgerye to work in the industry.

I also disagree that females aren't into looking at the male form. I love the male form, and always have. Much rather look at a men than women. The body is beautiful and should be celebrated. And it doesn't need to be in a porny way.

I am an american, and they just don't show dudes in the altogether except on HBO. i don't say I want porn, per se. but I think the natural depiction of the human body is ok by me. If its a scene where a normal human would be naked then depict them that way. Nudity need not b porn or exploitive. I think I'm more into demystifying the human body than in sexualizing it.

Another thing. The U.S.A may have the most LGBT rights, but that dosen't stop us being one of the most anti-gay nations in the world. Its both unfair and disgusting to treat gays like their trash.

[HystericalParoxysm]

... Is this thread just general US-bashing, or can we actually stick to the topic?

[fraroc]

This thread is about bashing the out of control censorship in the US, not the entire country.

[crocobaura]

Nevermind still have jobs, they still get the romantic lead roles. The number of films where I've gone 'ugh' in the romantic scene ...

Yeah, but would you also like to see them naked on TV? Women are traditionally seen as the "beautiful sex", there's more pressure on them to look good off the screen as well while men are regarded the "strong sex" and positively handsome if they are only slightly better looking thant he devil. :rofl:

[Rawra]

positively handsome if they are only slightly better looking thant he devil. :rofl:

I love that proverb :lol: .

I just don't mind if I GET to see men naked or not. I prefer the first option, but I don't see censorship as being SUCH a big deal. Think about kids - some of them may be more shocked to realize that their parents got naked and "did stuff" so they can "be made" than to see people killing each other. I know a couple of such children, who were absolutely mortified when they found out how kids are made. Like my brother, but I enjoyed telling him that and I said it intentionally to get him shocked, buuut that's a whole other story. :giggler:

[Oaktree]

Think about kids - some of them may be more shocked to realize that their parents got naked and "did stuff" so they can "be made" than to see people killing each other. I know a couple of such children, who were absolutely mortified when they found out how kids are made. Like my brother, but I enjoyed telling him that and I said it intentionally to get him shocked, buuut that's a whole other story. :giggler:

Doesn't that say something about the culture, though? We expose children to violence at young ages, inuring them to violence. But, once they reach early childhood, nudity becomes taboo and there is no talk whatsoever of sex. I can understand being cautious about teaching children too young to engage in the act about sex, but teaching them lies about biology is not the right approach. And being more willing to expose them to violence than biological fact is somewhat unsettling.

[Rawra]

I may speak from the perspective of a completely inexperienced woman regarding kids, so I may be wrong, but that's how I see things for now. I'll probably change my opinions when I will become a parent.

[SimsLover50]

Its up to parents to deal with what their kids watch on tv. As far as I'm concerned less tv and internet for sprogs is an awesome thing. TV has ratings and parents can use those as guidelines.

In many cultures sprogs see nudity all the time and don't faint. I mean, for hundreds of thousands of years most people went around naked and that was perfectly ok. Only now, is it shocking and appalling because Abrahamic religion teaches there is something wrong and sinful about being nude. Um... No. I really hate some of the prudish crap that was introduced by these ancient tribal religions which make people ashamed of their own bodies.

My parents weren't exhibitionists, but when I was a kid, I showered with my older brother, and took baths with my parents and it was not something that freaked me out. They weren't flaunting nudity but they took a natural approach. My mom even took me to a nude beach a time or two and I loved it. I grew up in the 70's.

Everyone is different of course, but I knew about the birds and the bee's in like first grade, and barbie and ken had sex to make babies. I think curtailing generic nudity 'for the children' isn't valid, because kids are shocked only by things they aren't used to.

[Robodl95]

There are plenty of giblet mushing stories out there, it's called erotica. If you're looking for it there's plenty but they might not sell it at your local bookstore. And about guys, it's not too hard to find boobs but more difficult to find a vagina and same for guys parts but have you ever payed attention to how many guys with great abs are on tv? (ie old spice)

[SimsLover50]

Well, speaking for myself, I'm not looking for erotica. I'm just looking for a tad more realism in relationships. Erotica is more focused on sexuality rather than storyline and that's not really what I personally am speaking of. There are a few abs on tv. But few an far between.

[crocobaura]

Male abs are not really considered "nudity", is it?

[Robodl95]

Male abs are not really considered "nudity", is it?
It's a sexual thing, just because he's not actually naked doesn't mean that there's not huge sexual vibes coming off of it (** assuming they're good abs, thanks croco). Which brings me to my next point, sexually repressed is different then nudity repressed. We're kinda sqeamish about nudity for some reason but sex is everywhere (just not seeing it) in humor, music, tv, and movies.

There are a few abs on tv. But few an far between.
I feel like I see them everywhere! Old Spice, Old Navy, Jersey shore, Twilight, etc. In every movie with a good looking actor it feels like they always try to find a reason for him to take his shirt off.

[crocobaura]

It's a sexual thing, just because he's not actually naked doesn't mean that there's not huge sexual vibes coming off of it.

There's sexual vibes only if the abs look good, otherwise it's just another hairy beer belly. Anyway, it's funny how this nudity is so accepted that people don't even notice it as nudity. I guess it's a cultural thing.

[Robodl95]

Anyway, it's funny how this nudity is so accepted that people don't even notice it as nudity. I guess it's a cultural thing
Nudity is when you're not wearing any clothes, being shirtless does not make you naked. I still get your point, the fairness about female bare chests vs. male bare chests are a totally different debate though.

[jhd1189]

I'm not convinced that that is the case. There's a hell of a lot of sexual content in American media - ranging from ads like this (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_wSClrCf7mCc/SwtWthfys6I/AAAAAAAAACE/2Lu7v4lqp58/s1600/tomford.GQ2.jpg) (not porn but also NSFW, though note the reasonably good photoshop job of removing the girl's nipples and areolae), to reality shows like America's Next Top Model, to fiction like True Blood which is pornographic at times.

Perhaps the sexual content receives more complaints and more criticism than other adult content, but that doesn't seem to have actually resulted in any reduction of it.

Backtracking to white's post from yesterday, but--this is pretty much how I feel about this topic. I'm not convinced that censorship is "out of control." There are levels of censorship in place (certain TV shows not being allowed to air before certain times, movie ratings, etc.) to give people the option of not having to see certain things, but... if you DO want to see them, they're typically available to you. Maybe it's fair to say that there's an imbalance in what the media glorifies and what it rarely bothers to show, but I don't think that really qualifies as being out of control.

[fraroc]

Backtracking to white's post from yesterday, but--this is pretty much how I feel about this topic. I'm not convinced that censorship is "out of control." There are levels of censorship in place (certain TV shows not being allowed to air before certain times, movie ratings, etc.) to give people the option of not having to see certain things, but... if you DO want to see them, they're typically available to you. Maybe it's fair to say that there's an imbalance in what the media glorifies and what it rarely bothers to show, but I don't think that really qualifies as being out of control.

To be honest, this had nothing to do with the media. I'm talking about a nation that glorifies death,crime, blood gore and violence and basically demonizes sex.

[anime$star]

Yay its sad how people exploit there bodys like this on movies sometimes its a sin to me just sayin what I think it is my opinion lol

[crocobaura]

Nudity is when you're not wearing any clothes, being shirtless does not make you naked. I still get your point, the fairness about female bare chests vs. male bare chests are a totally different debate though.

Then how come that it's not OK to go in public without your bottoms on even though you are wearing a shirt? Technically you're not naked.

[Alan_Gast]

^ I think it's because of the whole 'primary sexual organs' vs. 'secondary sexual organs' deal. I mean, I guess they see it as 'you don't need breasts to produce a child, so it isn't as offensive somehow'. They aren't used for fertilisation so much as titillation. Not to say a vag is any more offensive on TV than a pair of knockers, but I feel a fully naked frontal human form is never really seen on TV or in movies because the hyperconservative views regarding nudity in America of the past are still present in some form. Perhaps they feel like it'd be too shocking to the audience?

However, I feel like it's changing. At continental drift speed, but still. I remember there was Jason Segel fully naked in 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall', and that other guy in 'Zack and Miri make a porno'. Maybe because it was presented as funny rather than sexual it was regarded as more acceptable?

[Robodl95]

To be honest, this had nothing to do with the media. I'm talking about a nation that glorifies death,crime, blood gore and violence and basically demonizes sex.
Glorifies? Don't you think you're exaggerating quite a bit? People aren't as upset about violence as they are about sex (in media, but I think a dead baby will be more horrifying than sex to most) Most people don't go to movies to watch murders, and for anything non-fictional violence is taken very seriously. I feel like you're talking about an America of 60 years ago. There are ultra conservatives that feel sex is totally wrong but the overwhelming majority find sex to be natural and normal. I think that Americans are private with their sex lives, everyone thinks about it but not many want to talk about it.

[SimsLover50]

I think there a difference between real and fictional depiction of violence and sex, which is probably what the op is talking about.

[SuicidiaParasidia]

I'm a woman, and the lack of beefcake on tv, is obvious and a double standard. If we have to see so much skinny female cheescake, the least producers can do is show a few men once in a while. Also, total double-standard on actors vs.. actresses atractiveness level as actors can be unfit, balding, and downright ugly and still have jobs, while all women must have implants, and plastic surgerye to work in the industry.

I also disagree that females aren't into looking at the male form. I love the male form, and always have. Much rather look at a men than women. The body is beautiful and should be celebrated. And it doesn't need to be in a porny way.

I am an american, and they just don't show dudes in the altogether except on HBO. i don't say I want porn, per se. but I think the natural depiction of the human body is ok by me. If its a scene where a normal human would be naked then depict them that way. Nudity need not b porn or exploitive. I think I'm more into demystifying the human body than in sexualizing it.

this all actually reminds me of something a comedian whose name i cant remember once said, along the lines of, "you dont see naked men in porn/movies because heaven forbid a male audience member finds himself watching the man more than the woman!"
and i think there was an ounce of truth to it, too. nobody in america has yet to teach that sexuality is complicated, and that a man may be allowed to appraise another male body without being afraid of people judging him for it (whether he likes it or not is up to him, but even just really looking at all is strongly taboo among men).

and ditto on the women appreciating man-bodies part. i may not have much of a sex drive, but i do like to look at a fit male body as much as a lovely female body. both have beautiful aspects and i think its a damn shame to cover one of them up in favor of the other. at least so that we have a choice. (and again, ditto on the non-sexual part as well.)

[Robodl95]

Girls say things like "You look really pretty today!" all the time to each other, if a guy said something like that to another guy it would probably be taken the wrong way.

[jhd1189]

To be honest, this had nothing to do with the media. I'm talking about a nation that glorifies death,crime, blood gore and violence and basically demonizes sex.

If this has nothing to do with the media, then what exactly is being censored, and who is doing the censoring...?

[fraroc]

Girls say things like "You look really pretty today!" all the time to each other, if a guy said something like that to another guy it would probably be taken the wrong way.

I'm a guy, and I usually say something like "you look so fucking great man, your gonna get some tonight for sure!"

[SimsLover50]

Girls say things like "You look really pretty today!" all the time to each other, if a guy said something like that to another guy it would probably be taken the wrong way.


Guys seem more concerned that men are sexually attracted to them when they receive compliments from other men. This is not a problem women seem to have.

[Alan_Gast]

^ Hmm, thats a bit of a generalization. I have no problem with saying 'holy crap, your hoodie is awesome!' to my (male) best friend. Or saying 'your shoes are awesome!'. Neither of us are gay, by the way, we just aren't so insecure with our sexuality that we are too scared to compliment each other. It also helps that we both have uh-maz-ing taste in clothes, hehe.

In my experience, I think that is more common in large male friend circles because there's bound to be one imbecile who makes a mean remark if one male compliments another, and many men want to be the alpha dog and NOT the butt of jokes, so they simply refrain from doing so. :)

[SimsLover50]

:shrug: maybe. Although if you look at letters and things written about men from the past, you'll see that modern men are quite shy about expressing their feelings towards other men. Why this is so, I cannot say, however this hasn't been always so. My assumption is men are uncomfortable showing real affection towards other men without it being perceived as somehow wrong/negative/sexual.

[katy perry]

I must admit I'm a bit reluctant to giving a compliment to anyone or showing affection. Maybe it's just being paranoid me but they'll percieve that as me hitting on them.

[Mistermook]

This is just our generation though. Guys are quite a bit more homophobic than they used to be, which is sad.
Considering that men used to beat homosexuals to death, put them in prison, and the like, I'm pretty sure that's demonstrably not so.

Not to mention that "our" generation here is a fairly fluid term, considering the wide variation in ages and where people are from. It's nearly a useless variable, unless it's applied simply to "our = people who have played The Sims," at which point it's becomes uselessly narrow for grand social demonstrations of characterization.

[Oaktree]

I must admit I'm a bit reluctant to giving a compliment to anyone or showing affection. Maybe it's just being paranoid me but they'll percieve that as me hitting on them.

I actually seem to have a bit of this problem. I'm not shy about complimenting people or just being generally friendly, so sometimes I'm told that I'm being flirtatious. In truth, I've never actually flirted with someone, as I don't really know how to.

[katy perry]

I actually seem to have a bit of this problem. I'm not shy about complimenting people or just being generally friendly, so sometimes I'm told that I'm being flirtatious. In truth, I've never actually flirted with someone, as I don't really know how to.

Thinking about it, it could be they have the problem. I mean if someone percieves 'I like those boots you are wearing' as 'I want to sleep with you' then very clearly they have their own issues.

[SimsLover50]

Considering that men used to beat homosexuals to death, put them in prison, and the like, I'm pretty sure that's demonstrably not so.

Not to mention that "our" generation here is a fairly fluid term, considering the wide variation in ages and where people are from. It's nearly a useless variable, unless it's applied simply to "our = people who have played The Sims," at which point it's becomes uselessly narrow for grand social demonstrations of characterization.


Okay, point taken. I shall edit my post.

I think it has more to do with the perception that somone has sexual intent when complimenting another man that seems to be a modern concern.

[Robodl95]

It definitely does depend on what exactly you say. I don't think (most) guys would have an issue with "that's an awesome shirt!" but I think it gets uncomfortable when you stop addressing specific articles of clothing and start talking about the whole person "you look really nice today" might be kinda weird. Everyone is different (we haven't even mentioned age, location, religion, social clique etc.) so there's not really one answer. Relationship plays a factor too since if you've known each for a long time then you'll know that he's (probably) not gay and is actually just paying you a compliment.

[CmarNYC]

It's always seemed to me that men have a bit of a phobia about admitting they notice other men are attractive. I remember a few times discussing male actors or celebrities with friends and seeing the guys shug and say: "I'm a guy so I don't know if he's good-looking."

Personally I think graphic, detailed violence should be considered obscene the way graphic, detailed sex is now. However, I kind of disagree that books, movies, etc. don't have extensive sex scenes simply because of prudery or that 'fade to black' is a bad thing in an adult-oriented story. I think in at least some cases it's because it's damn hard to have a good sex scene that has some originality, contributes to the plot and character development, doesn't wind up looking silly, and doesn't bring the story to a crashing halt. It's worse in books since no one even agrees on what words to use for body parts and so on. I've seen it done, but it's rare.

[unalisaa]

Relationship plays a factor too since if you've known each for a long time then you'll know that he's (probably) not gay and is actually just paying you a compliment.
Would you be uncomfortable if a girl you weren't attracted to paid you a compliment?

[Robodl95]

Yeah I would for a couple reasons. First off I'm slightly uncomfortable when anyone gives me a compliment cause I'm just shy like that. Second would be that I wouldn't want to lead her on and make her think that I was interested.

[Purity4]

Would you be uncomfortable if a girl you weren't attracted to paid you a compliment?

Not at all. Compliments are not always, and in my experience rarely, sexual.

[SimsLover50]

I find most people of either gender like compliments unless they are creepy kind. =-)

[Tempscire]

Second would be that I wouldn't want to lead her on and make her think that I was interested.
I can see how you might think that about giving someone a compliment, but receiving one and just gracefully mumbling "thanks"? If someone took the latter as a sign of interest, well, they'd have to be completely socially clueless.

[Robodl95]

I can see how you might think that about giving someone a compliment, but receiving one and just gracefully mumbling "thanks"? If someone took the latter as a sign of interest, well, they'd have to be completely socially clueless.
Depends on the person. A lot of compliments are intended to get attention.

[SimsLover50]

Depends on the person. A lot of compliments are intended to get attention.

I always try to compliment someone when I genuinely think whatever they have/done/are doing/or look is nice.

Fake compliments are pretty obvious and self serving.