You tied everything together nicely and I was glad to see that Elyssa/Aiden/Granny got their happy ending. The last picture = tear jerker; so, so adorable. Your inclusion of a theme song was very clever as well. Great job!
Aww super sweet ending, nicely wrapped up! I really enjoyed your story Ladyawesome it had heart and great character development, nice work :-)
Awww. I actually had tears in my eyes when I read the end. A sad ending - but the right one. What I wanted to say - is that LA has the gift of storytelling. Spelling and grammar and continuity is what a good copyeditor is for - LA can generate the "gotta" - and that cannot be taught. She has taken us on a rollercoaster ride of laughter and tears and all in the sims universe, and that is why this is this judge's favourite story.
What a lovely ending. The selflessness of Aiden is touching even though he didn't like the vampire in the beginning. His joining with his parents and Elyssa's discovery was moving, almost to the point of tears. It was a lovely wrap up. Perfect, perfect choice for the bonus quote!
Tamlyn
Originality = 10
Excerpt = 10
Characters = 10
Events = 10
Creativity = 40
Pictures =10
Mood = 10
Staging = 10
Scene = 30
Flow = 20
Rules = 5
CC = 5
Total = 100
Bonus = 10
OVERALL TOTAL
9
10
10
10
39
10
9
10
29
18
5
5
96
10
106
9
8
9
8
34
10
10
8
28
20
5
5
92
10
102
8
10
9
10
37
10
10
10
30
20
5
5
97
10
107
This story really came full circle and although the ending for me was expected it did not dissapoint me. Your creativity in both the world and the characters you write is inspiring and you write simply yet beautifully drawing in your readers and making them commit fully to the story you tell, great job!
OOOH. What a fab mental image on the last line. "He led me to the edge of the shadows. He held me close and took me through them." I think Neil himself might be proud of that one. I liked how you wrapped up the story with a character review - a nice touch.
I feel as though the introspection matches well with the first chapter. She's been quiet and reserved and battling with herself in the beginning and does this again at the end. She finally made a choice of her own, with Zayne. The ending leaves for lovely follow up, wink, wink. Or at least where we can imagine what happens.
I love the cliffhanger you ended with. You did a great job explaining what her family’s reaction would have been without actually having to write that plot in (having her brother see her with Zayne and such) and keeping a bit of mystery about where/what Zayne and Sofie will go/do after this point was awesome. Two thumbs up.
Elexis
Originality = 10
Excerpt = 10
Characters = 10
Events = 10
Creativity = 40
Pictures =10
Mood = 10
Staging = 10
Scene = 30
Flow = 20
Rules = 5
CC = 5
Total = 100
Bonus = 10
OVERALL TOTAL
8
10
8
10
36
10
9
10
29
16
5
5
91
10
101
8
8
9
9
34
10
9
10
29
19
5
5
92
10
102
9
10
10
10
39
10
9
10
29
20
5
5
98
10
108
Beautiful, just beautiful. Yes, a dark ending might have been more expected by some, but the character of Han that you have painted so far - he just wouldn't. To me, it fits perfectly with the story of a good guy being slowly turned rotten by the thirst for revenge - but yeah, love conquers all. Great story, great pictures - thank you.
So sweet that a single, "diamond" tear dissolves Han's beast. I still rather wanted the leader to go "splat" but…I suppose this was the better way. Lovely last picture. I can just imagine them zooming around in Paris, both free to live their lives as they please, with each other.
Great ending, Elexis. Your theme song was great and the ending made me so happy for Han. I’m glad that he got some closure and was able to move on from his revenge; not to mention find a lovely lady in the process. The last picture was especially lovely and extremely well set-up; I think it’s my favorite one from your story (which was a difficult pick since all of your pictures have been gorgeous). Also, Han and Alex are so cute together!
Absolutely stunning last shot which summed up the ending brilliantly. I've said it before but i'll say it again i have loved the images that accompanied your story and the characters you created were just beautiful. Your writing has a great edge ad mood to it which i simply adore, great work ;-)
missroxor
Originality = 10
Excerpt = 10
Characters = 10
Events = 10
Creativity = 40
Pictures =10
Mood = 10
Staging = 10
Scene = 30
Flow = 20
Rules = 5
CC = 5
Total = 100
Bonus = 10
OVERALL TOTAL
9
10
9
10
38
10
9
10
29
18
5
5
95
10
105
9
10
9
10
38
10
9
10
29
19
5
5
96
10
106
10
10
9
10
39
10
8
9
27
19
5
5
95
10
105
First thought? The weasel got what he deserved! Your pictures were spot on for the scenes. I also love that Atlas was able to recognize his shortcomings. It wasn't just about forgiving to get what he wanted. He truly realized that he had been wrong which led to redemption. I like how you tied a previous quote in at the end of the story in his oath to his sons. Do we get a follow-up, perhaps in the eyes of the sons?
Another lovely ending from another lovely contestant! The way you wrapped things up was lovely and I’m glad that Sadie/Atlas were able to explore their relationship (and live!) after that chaos. Also, Atlas’ last oath to his sons was both adorable and uplifting (in the sense that he won’t repeat the mistakes of his parents/father). I was so excited when you took the story in the direction that you took it and I was definitely not disappointed with how you handled/wrote it all. Fantastic, simply fantastic.
Out of all the stories this one has taken the most unexpected turn and has kept me riveted to finding out it's conclusion. You didn't disappoint me either! Amazing use of the quote, it fit superbly. The imagination which it must of taken for you to even think up the turn of events in your story is enviable, i very much enjoyed this story great work :-)
MISS ROXOR - you are amazing. When this story opened I expected a simple lost on a desert island story. I was stunned by the plot twists and turns and I liked the idea of forgiveness and true sorrow being the key to it all, a story for our times
Scores updated on first post as well.
Heaven Sims | Avendale Legacy
"On the internet, you can be anything you want. It's strange that so many people choose to be stupid."