That's a great person, I hope they live... and you are never a bitch, ever. and that acne thing is some spam artist idiot expecting people to click that link and get a virus.

*hugs tightly* I am so sorry hun. I hope that your friend gets better. And naw, your not a cold hearted biotch. Its just how people deal with different stuff. And it does suck. Death is not a beautiful thing, however, it is part of life... And that sucks.

And, really how did this go from passing to acne? o.O

But one more thing...

Death is only the beginning. Never the end. Just the end of our physical bodies, not our spirits.

When my parents died, when I was at work I acted as if it was just another natural event that one can expect at some point in his life. I tried to adopt that attitude at home, but at some point it all came crashing down at once. I didn't want to appear vulnerable at work or give into emotions because I couldn't stop sobbing once I started. So I acted...emotionless, something like what you're describing. I think it's just a form of self-protection. You aren't cold hearted, you are grieving and everyone does that differently.

I hope your friend gets better.

I still suffer everyday from the death of my best friend. He was murdered by a classmate, and sadly I got front row tickets to see it happen. I remember every single detail. I'm still not over it. I smile a lot and pretend I don't remember, but I think about him everyday.

I don't know how you would ever get over that one. How horrible. How utterly horrifying. Hopefully there will come the day when the memory of how he died and your sense of loss won't be the first thing to come to mind when you think of him. When that happens, you can start to enjoy your memories.

In 1999 on Christmas Eve my parents and younger sister went to North Carolina to spend Christmas with my mom's parents. I stared behind with my paternal grandparents. I will never forget that cold chill that went through my body when the phone rang and the only two words out of my grandfather's mouth were "Angie died". I was only nine years old and never in a million years did I expect to lose my mother, especially when she was only 28 years old.
To this day I cannot listen to Christmas carols or look at Christmas decor without crying. Her death pretty much stole the blissful ignorance of my childhood and now when somebody in my family doesn't call when they are supposed to or the phone rings at an odd hour I feel a sence of panic.
Religion does help me to a point, but admittedly my mother's death changed who I was and who I will be for the rest of my life. And with my daughter due to be born in a couple of weeks (who we are naming Angela after my mother) and my husband working as a mechanic on strip mines, I spend more time afraid that something will happen to one of them than I do doing anything else.

When my dad died in 2000 it wasn't unexpected, as he'd been sick since 1971. Still, though, you keep thinking "yeah, he's going to die" but you keep pushing it into the future, and then you're a bit surprised when this "future" becomes the present.

I just let myself feel the pain and just work through it.

Still, I remember leaving the cemetery after the funeral and thinking that it didn't feel right to just leave him there, all alone.

The really weird thing is both me and my husband can tell when people are going to die.

Most of the time we shut up and just tell each other, but some times we will tell very close friends.
My very good friend of 20 years had a very sick mother, she had been sick for a only a short time, but I told him she was going to die and as a result he spent every available moment with her.
When she did die he felt like he had some time with her that he otherwise would not have had.
Sorry for my morbid off topic post, I just wanted to share.

That's not morbid at all. When I was younger, I was a Sophomore in High School. And I kept having this dream about this girl. I could see the back of her head, and she kept saying

"I am going to kill myself."

And she continued to call my house. And kept saying the same thing. I kept throwing it out of my mind, until I met my best friend. I was a Senior in high school then. And we were supposed to go hang with her grandparents for a summer, her mother said no. And she was very depressed then. Before she left. And I kid you not, she called me one day saying:

"There is a rock in the yard, and it could look like an accident."

And I talked to her for four hours, and she still is alive. She is my best friend. And we always try to hang out, but seeing we live in two different cities, it makes it hard.

I know...Its not about death, but if I hadn't met her or talked to her for four hours, she may not be here.

So, opiumgirl, it's not morbid at all.

im...actually quite the spiritual person. its not often the grief stays with me long, since grief tends to be directly anchored to the idea of "losing" something/someone...and for me, it was hard to feel like id "lost" someone when i could feel them still with me. and to illustrate, this feeling was so strong that sometimes i'd forget that the person had died and would look for them to ask them a question, only to remember a few minutes later that, oh yeah, they are dead.

for the longest time after my father died, i could feel his presence standing in my doorway at night when i went to sleep. this did not bother me, because i remembered that he would check in on us kids like that too, sometimes, while he was alive. it was comforting to instinctively know that he was still there, and i think it only encouraged me to let go of him faster.

but then, all sorts of freaky things happen around me that i cant explain, and really, i cant think of it being anything else other than spirits transcending death. and simple logic dictates that everything is energy, and energy cannot be destroyed..merely changed.
as obvious as it is to some that they do not exist, or that they go someplace after they die, it is obvious to me that they do not. i simply cant ignore what has slapped me upside the head continually in the form of personal experience, refusing to be minimized and categorized. ive come to stop fearing it and embrace it as just another facet of life. its been a while since ive felt my fathers presence, but i dont need to any more. its enough for me to know that he isnt suffering any more, wherever he is... it may even turn out that what im witnessing is "normal", and everyone else is just freakishly closed to the world. :P

and then there's that i generally dont see the big hoopla about death in the first place. the fact is, we do not know what happens, and id think itd be pretty foolish to mourn it if it turns out death is a thousand/million/billion times better than life is.

I'm so sorry for all your loss (all of you up above my post) .
Personally , I would answer the question with : You don't get over it .
In my case , the only being I ever loved was my Grand Ma . And when she died two things happen .
1- My familly took their sweet time to tell me she was gone .
2- I never attended the funeral (cose she was already 6feets under) .
3- we have a whole ocean separating us !

The whole ocean kinda help , because otherwise..the whole familly would've followed my grand ma once I'm done with them .

am I over it ? no , I don't think so . I'm just grateful I have a picture of her..so I can't and won't forget who she was and what she looked like .
And in my personal experience : Get over it usually mean Will ya shut up already!
At least...when I grieve that'S usually how it sound..lot of insensitives peoples around me lol
But for me Getting over it : is accepting that she isn't with us but watching over us or me lol
Though it is a new concept , cose the way i was raised and all . I have a hard time believing that someone who is dead is watching over you . We (in my ethnie) don't believe in after life..at least not the way christian do (or others do) .
I don't mean any offence by this , I'm getting used to the idea (and hopefully she is watching over me otherwise I,m so screwed) . But it is kinda weird when you are not used to think like that....or never heard of things like that .
So yeah...I'm not sad that she is gone . Cose she was my Goddess in life , and she will always will be .