Home | Download | Discussion | Help | Site Map | New Posts | Sign in
Replies: 4293 (Who?), Viewed: 165847 times.
Page 172 of 172
Alchemist
#4276 Old 5th Dec 2018 at 3:54 PM
Really pessimistic today.
It's the 5th December, still don't know what my sister's doing for Christmas. She's most likely (like every year) waiting for me to basically arrange it all for her but I'm not going to. About 2 weeks ago she asked me when I was working, I sent her my rota and she replied "you're working a lot" (I work 38 hours a week, not "a lot"). Well, if you wanted to see me, maybe you should've arranged something sooner. I have a job. Residents need care on Christmas too. We've already agreed Christmas day won't work, because my Dad can't drive her over. Which I'm completely fine with, because Adam's sister already invited us over because she actually cares whether we see her or not. We agree (basically I give her dates me and Adam are available) on either Friday before Christmas or Friday after, and for her to check with Dad. That was two weeks ago. He hasn't heard a thing from her about it, but says by this point he's already planned on working both those days. He wants me to come visit her, but why should I? Every year when I lived in Aberystwyth I had to stay for a week, and it was a nightmare. She basically uses me as free childcare, she would have me sleep on the sofa with no blanket, her house set off my ashma, and now that I'm pregnant and I'm definitely not staying over for more than a few hours, she has cats that wipe their asses all over everything and her house stinks. I have better things to do than harm my unborn baby and sit about while she types away at her computer ignoring her kids, not making any conversation and expecting me to just sit there and entertain them.

I don't know what to do. On the one hand, I don't want to just give in but on the other, it's kinda making Christmas pretty stressful in that I have no idea if I'm going to be hosting a family get together around Christmas time or not.

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
#4277 Old 5th Dec 2018 at 6:55 PM
Wifi's back, but it's shit. I can't even play Slither.io without intermittent lagging.

Life is paradoxically coincidental to the ironical tyranny applicable to the unparalleled definition of reverse entropy.

"A thunderstorm breaks the wall of darkness." - Lyrics to Storm

"Meh." - me
Alchemist
#4278 Old 6th Dec 2018 at 1:09 PM
I'm still so annoyed about what happened about a week ago. It started when we were trying to show our scan to my Mother-in-Law. My Fiance mentioned "Remember when you were rubbing Cassie's belly and said that she wasn't pregnant yet? Turns out she was", and then she goes "oh I know I just didn't want to say anything". Okay. She kept saying about how she knew all along, and it kinda dampened the surprise, but hey I can get that, maybe she had hunches - she probably would've even if we didn't concieve at first because the minute you tell someone you're trying so you've started buying baby clothes, they automatically presume you are or you're about to be. Cool. But then suddenly it becomes a whole whirlwind discussion on my parenting with my brother, because yes he acts out sometimes. It became a whole "the problem is, he's your brother and not your child, so he sees you as a sister", even extending it to "He sees Adam as his mate" (okay, don't know how many friends he has that tell him to do his chores and tell him he's grounded when he acts out) - but that's not the problem. If you really wanted to "help" me, then you'd sit back and maybe take in what I'm saying. He doesn't see me as his sister, if you looked at the ways he treats our 3 other sisters, it's pretty apparent. He's always seen me as a parent because I've always been a parent to him, even from when we were very little. But no, everyone (Mother-in-law, Sister-in-law, Step-Father-in-Law) all telling me that this is the definitive problem, and my teenager can't act out because he's a teenager, no, this is why. Despite the fact that he's never tried smoking, or drinking, he's never had sex, which is more than I can say for her children at that age (kinda a hilarious throwback to last Christmas when Adam's youngest sister mentioned how many people she's slept with and Adam shouts "STOP" every time I bring up that memory) and she was their parent, so how come my brother's problems with apathy and anger issues are souly because of this? He got in trouble on his first day of primary school for kicking a kid in the crotch (apparently the kid was bullying him) - I wasn't his legal guardian then so why is his anger issues my fault now? If you wanted to "help" so much, then maybe actually try to help instead of masking a serious issue with a ridiculous excuse. The worst part is, because Adam has had 28 years of his Mum deciding the way things are, he just agrees to shut her up. "Yeah well he does kinda see her as a sister" he said. Which really irritated me more. Sure he tried to argue against that idea several times, but he completely smashed everything he built up when he said that. Argh.

Then ofcourse everyones telling me I need help. I need to get a social worker to take him out sometimes so he's out of my hair. Why? Why do I need that? Why do I need "time off" from my child? If anything, I feel like I don't get enough time with him because a lot of the time he keeps himself cooped up in his bedroom after school and on the weekends he goes swimming with his friends. I need more time with him, sometimes I think he feels ignored because of mine and Adam's busy work schedules (we both work all day Saturday and Sunday, Adam comes home at 6pm every weekday and I come home 8pm most weekdays). Also what is a social worker going to do? He had a social worker when he moved in with us to "Help him transition", and they deemed him fine. Really, I think my brother has ADD/ADHD and depression that's been left untreated for a while. Yes, he needs some help, but he needs help in the way of a therapist (a proper one, not one he just lies to because he's bored of going), not in the way of someone to come over once a week and take him off our hands for an afternoon.

She told me, several times "You're not ready to be a parent of a teenager", but why not? Yeah, two weeks ago he was a butthole. She doesn't even know about the stuff he said to me when he was told to sit in the corner and write lines, but outside of that, I have a child who is super sensitive, who is slightly clingy and wants to be cuddled and held (even though he's 15), who I can trust to go out with his friends without worrying about him coming home drunk or knocking a girl up or smoking or doing drugs or fighting. Which is more than I can say for kids around here. He struggles to concentrate in class, but he at least does his homework and turns up on time. He has friends that actually like him for who he is, and he's never trying to be the "cool" kid. Even though he tells me I embarrass him when we go out in public and walk past one of his friends, he still cuddles me in front of his friends before he goes to sleepovers. I actually really like him as a kid, he's not inherently bad, he's just misunderstood and nobody is giving him the help he needs, because every time we take him to therapy it's "so how do you feel about your sister? Do you like your sister's partner?", god help us when the baby comes, I bet "Are you having anger issues because there's a new family member?" will become one of the questions. No wonder he quits therapy every single time we try to take him.

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
Alchemist
#4279 Old 6th Dec 2018 at 10:56 PM
Just leave me alone. I screwed up my finances. I was so good with them this autumn, and the worst nightmare for me is my bank account dipped backwards.

I hate December.

"There are some obstacles that cannot be removed with a mere show of force."
-King of Atlantis, as portrayed by Leonard Nimoy, Atlantis: The Lost Empire
Mad Poster
#4280 Old 9th Dec 2018 at 5:38 PM
I have been sick for two weeks now, and right at the end of the semester and when I'm starting a new duty station at work. On top of being unpleasant, this is just getting boring.

Welcome to the Dark Side...
We lied about having cookies.
Alchemist
#4281 Old 10th Dec 2018 at 2:55 PM Last edited by PANDAQUEEN : 10th Dec 2018 at 4:36 PM.
Be glad I don't have powers to turn you into what you insulted me as. If I had that power, there would be an awful lot of livestock heading to slaughter.

Been irritated for quite some time. To those who know me well enough, I have been trying to get a hold of my emotions and Anger took the helm out of the 100 emotions in the office.

Sadly, my emotional exhaustion is from a number of factors: although my mother is Jewish, she fully embraces Christmas as if she has celebrated as part of her life. Now, she's very obsessed with the Christmas season and because of that Nth degree, I get upset. I never knew someone this obsessed with Christmas. Really wish she would tone down the intensity cause I try to have some recognition of who I am.

That and today, I have one last chance before my father goes to court and may lose the ability to drive for a preset amount of time. I have to pick up a few things.

Personally, December is usually sucky for me.

"There are some obstacles that cannot be removed with a mere show of force."
-King of Atlantis, as portrayed by Leonard Nimoy, Atlantis: The Lost Empire
Scholar
#4282 Old 11th Dec 2018 at 10:36 AM
I am mad at the President. F*cking c*nt goes on to say the minimum wage is gonna get a 100 euro increase/per month but it's a lie. It's not the minimum wage - it's a bonus that SOME workers get and I, for example, personally don't have the right to that bonus, but still, I earn minimum wage. So don't go on TV telling us that "THE MINIMUM WAGE is increasing by 100 euros". I'm so disappointed. There's other things regarding this issue but this one particularly affects me so...
Alchemist
#4283 Old 11th Dec 2018 at 9:00 PM Last edited by PANDAQUEEN : 11th Dec 2018 at 9:52 PM.
Well, somehow, my father got 3 months without a license plus fewer fees to repay to the respective people.

I'm not going to question how except that attorney's career background is well put together.

However, I have numerous appointments ahead.

Pretty much irritated about the fact I have to be careful with my voice.

I'm also angry about distasteful comedians. There's a reason why you don't hire someone who is an insult comedian. One wrong joke and you can be banned from events or lose your job. A distasteful joke is social suicide. It goes beyond tweets from the past. In the eyes of show business, repentance is unfortunately sparse in distribution. I have noted this issue of repercussions of past indiscretions since James Gunn was fired from "Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 3". However, there is more to it than I had let on.

"There are some obstacles that cannot be removed with a mere show of force."
-King of Atlantis, as portrayed by Leonard Nimoy, Atlantis: The Lost Empire
Inventor
#4284 Old 12th Dec 2018 at 1:13 AM
Being a Patient
The joke is that they're called "patients" because they have to have patience while waiting for the doctor at their appointment. Today I waited an hour. There was a little note nicely framed on the wall about this. Thanking the patient for arriving on time (actually 15 minutes early is when they tell you to show up) and saying that sometimes they're run late because they're providing excellent care to someone else, and maybe, one day if you don't die in the waiting room first, they'll give you that extra attention.
And they charge my insurance $400 for that 15 minutes that they visit and rip the "patient" a new one for being over weight or having cholesterol levels that are normal for healthy humans but made criminal by the AMA and big pharma... cuz sell drugs.
That's the part that gets old; waiting an hour to be chewed out. Their pay is more than just the money, they get a piece of you. It's sort or like working retail, except backwards; In retail, the customer gets to give you a bad time as part of the sale. In medicine, the physician gets to give you a bad time.
I would have walked out, but I was afraid that they'd deny my blood pressure drugs (I've had high blood pressure since I was 16 and still running track). I need those.

Health Insurance Companies practicing medicine
I get a phone call about a procedure which is coming up soon from someone who says they're from my insurance company. She probably was; but the assumption that she was talking about my knee operation was all mine. She asks if I have any questions about the procedure. Yeah, how long before I can go up and down stairs? I want to know that because I need to know how much food to set aside so I can feed myself. She can't answer that until I verify who I am.
They called me! I mean, I know that's how my insurance company works, but it is also exactly how information fishing works. Scammers call you and then try to get information out of you.
I said thanks, and hung up. It's really not the insurance company's business anyway.
Not the caller's fault, but the guy at the insurance company who thought this up is an idiot who trains old people to be suckers for PII scammers.
I'm pretty sure my insurance company is trying to talk me out of this. I already got an e-mail saying they'll pay for a second opinion.

Sims are better than us.
Alchemist
#4285 Old 12th Dec 2018 at 12:23 PM Last edited by PANDAQUEEN : 12th Dec 2018 at 2:22 PM.
Welcome to the Suck Parade...and the hits keep coming.

I'm extremely upset. Those who once called me "my friend" to me have given me no reason to keep friends if I ever make one.

Rather be a lone wolf if this is how it goes.

"There are some obstacles that cannot be removed with a mere show of force."
-King of Atlantis, as portrayed by Leonard Nimoy, Atlantis: The Lost Empire
Alchemist
#4286 Old 12th Dec 2018 at 3:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by PANDAQUEEN
Welcome to the Suck Parade...and the hits keep coming.

I'm extremely upset. Those who once called me "my friend" to me have given me no reason to keep friends if I ever make one.

Rather be a lone wolf if this is how it goes.

Who needs friends. Here's a collection of things a friend has done to me:

1. They explained to me what Nazi's were, because they presumed my country (Wales/Britain) wouldn't know.
1.5 - and various other ignorant comments (just the Nazi's one was the funniest) where they presume just because I'm not American that I don't know anything about literally anything, including psychology - which I have a Masters Degree in. Pretty sure they think I live in a mudhut or whatever, based on the things they say.
2. That I shouldn't lie for attention about being raped. When I mentioned it once, in passing, with minimal context.
3. They told me that I am of no use to them because they don't agree with my beliefs and that they shouldn't bother talking to me
4. Continuously used me as a personal diary where they unloaded their daily activities to me as if I'm some kind of "What did you do today?" thread on a forum. No matter my choice of conversation topics, it winds back to their family/dvd collection/imaginary boyfriend within 2 sentences. No matter what.
5. Made a mutual friend of ours feel like crap because they got treated the same way by this friend

I've extended an "olive branch" to them 3 times now and forgiven them for their attitude because I understand their various problems pretty well, yet here we are again. The same damn argument where I'll eventually forgive them because I know they need a friend, and they'll continue to use me as a diary and berate me about my country or try to teach me outdated/false psychology because they know literally nothing about me despite being friends for over 2 years.


Doors always open, man.

~Your friendly neighborhood ginge
Inventor
#4287 Old 13th Dec 2018 at 11:25 PM
Seems kinda sexist. Kid acts up in school, and dad gets hammered. Teacher, wife principal and even the kid is jumping all over me. Mom can mess the kid up for most of her childhood, school can let her get away with murder and then damn it dad, why don't you fix this NOW? It's your gender role to discipline kids - that's the assumption.
I've been trying! Who takes her to the therapists? Who pays? Who's been doing everything the therapists suggests and is trying to be a better dad?
Tired of this. I'm thinking mobile home out in the Nevada high desert.

Next week: I will be out of my mind on pain pills and stuck up stairs. I'll be out of the loop. More like a vacation. Starvation and having my knee slit open, my bones sawed away and chunks of metal stuck in my knee is a small price to pay for peace.

Sims are better than us.
#4288 Old 14th Dec 2018 at 4:48 AM
I'm trying to relax a bit before I have to return to school on January 22 - time's been pretty messed up lately, so it'll be on top of us pretty quickly, no doubt - and my mom keeps interrupting me. "Do this!" she says. Next second it's "no, do that!" and then "DO THAT NOW!" a bajillion times, even though I heard her clearly the first time. I'll get to that, Mom. I'm not the Flash/Daredevil/whatever fast superhero there is. If I were, I'd have bigger problems than the house not being clean, since I could do that in 0.0000005 seconds. But for now, my biggest issue is my disability (autism spectrum) and how it'll affect my college career and eventually my future career as an astronaut. Now, don't get me wrong, I can clean the house, and I have no issues doing that, but I take issue in Mom telling me to do something that SHE could do right then and there, AND also not telling me things until the day of or after, AND making things seem like a big deal when they aren't. I'm not the only mess on this planet. Or, anywhere in the universe, for that matter. The house doesn't need to be scrubbed clean EVERY SINGLE DAY. It only seems that way because it wasn't meant for multiple pets. Also, the wifi issues? This place was meant for folk who do a lot more reading or knitting or whatever old folk do than use the internet a whole bunch. (I don't have much of a choice in the whole internet matter, anyway - it IS needed for school.)

Plus it seems that she takes issue in me wearing my NASA Apollo mission jacket that I got at my local science center when 1) it's comfy as hell, which is more than the actual winter jackets can say, 2) my autism should explain why I wear this jacket so much since autism basically affects my behavior/social skills, 3) it has actual, functional pockets that render purses useless and 4) I paid $88 dollars for this damn jacket, I'm going to wear it when I want. Which is every day. Because my phone doesn't fit in jean pockets. I would let Mom wash it, but I don't trust her enough. (She may end up hiding it, which would screw me over BIG time and there is no way in heaven or hell I'm letting THAT happen. This is my future we're talking about, damnit! I'm gonna be an astronaut whether she likes it or not!)

Man, I wish I could move out, but the only nearby auto shops that offer a car-related job is Dobb's or Jiffylube, and neither of those are that closeby. And God forbid I go back to food service or cashier - the pay may be good, but neither provide the experience I need to have a shot at entering the astronaut program, which is 3 years' experience in a STEM field I studied in. (Though I am gonna use the Automotive Tech program as a stepping stone into Aerospace Engineering, so I'd have no lack of jobs there, but for now, I'm stuck with fixing cars. My mom does doubt that I'd do well in Aerospace Engineering, while I say otherwise. Will it be tricky? Yes. But impossible? No.)

Life is paradoxically coincidental to the ironical tyranny applicable to the unparalleled definition of reverse entropy.

"A thunderstorm breaks the wall of darkness." - Lyrics to Storm

"Meh." - me
Mad Poster
#4289 Old 14th Dec 2018 at 5:34 PM
Tired of this. I'm thinking mobile home out in the Nevada high desert.

Next week: I will be out of my mind on pain pills and stuck up stairs. I'll be out of the loop. More like a vacation. Starvation and having my knee slit open, my bones sawed away and chunks of metal stuck in my knee is a small price to pay for peace.[/QUOTE]

You're scaring me, Emmett. I'm worried you really will go hungry. Is there time for you to call Adult Services to see whether you can get some help?

Why is it the songs we hate the most set up permanent residence in our brains? Chris Hatch's family friendly files archived on SFS: http://www.modthesims.info/showthread.php?t=603534 . Bulbizarre's website: https://bulbizarre.neocities.org/
Inventor
#4290 Old 14th Dec 2018 at 5:41 PM
Well, I won't starve. I need to get my little second hand fridge upstairs (I wonder if it works?) and find a place to put it.
I'll go to the store and get some canned chicken and spinach. Need 50 g protein.
Besides, hunger will be a motivation to recover quickly instead of laying in bed playing the sims all day and shopping for land and a mobile home.

Sims are better than us.
Alchemist
#4291 Old 14th Dec 2018 at 7:16 PM Last edited by PANDAQUEEN : 14th Dec 2018 at 8:07 PM.
I no longer care.

Why should I even bother?

For all I know, my father's addiction to sugar will worsen and he ransacks the town of Christmas candy.

My mother is probably going to be waiting to make a move where she moves to Frankenmuth and starts a cat sanctuary.

Because of this, my grandfather and grandma Barb would have to watch out for me because my dad would go to prison for his breaking and entering and I would have to live with the embarrassment of his motive.

Although it seems ridiculous for the idea for my family to fall apart in such fashion...

...I live with my own misery of having to go to the doctor on weekly basis and I hate it. But it's the only way I can get help. However, I haven't been to the doctor in a long time and it's hard to talk to them when they push you to go to some group where people are out of touch and are likely to violate the confidentiality clause. We're still appealing to the insurance company about the ridiculous guidelines. It's like "How many times do we need to tell you: I don't work in group therapy!"

Argh, my last therapy session was November 1. I'm going to bring my father, because he has more clout and he smells a rat in the policies and my denial of services rendered normally unto me.

I would never joke about being sick. Remember, there are people worse off than you and people worse off than me. I should consider myself lucky I live somewhere with service available and can actually see them.

Beyond any diagnosis I have, I am usually just someone who wants to dream about things of like a life beyond my house and hometown. I might want to go sightseeing in New York City, which is an hour's drive from my home. I might want to be a full service hobby shop owner for doll making. I might want to meet someone nice, someone who nurtures my soul, even if they turn their clumsiness into an art form and gets excited over insane details like I do. I recently reached something of a quarter life crisis. I don't know if psychology classified it in a note in the DSM-IV, but whatever I'm going through, it's been wrecking my life. It started on December 9th and it's giving me a headache.

I have been trying to get ahold of a letter from the office, but I have my life turning into an ARGGH!Fest with Christmukkah coming up. From sunset on December 17 to 11:59:59 PM on January 6, I surrender my time to lighting the LED menorah (after one of the cats caught fire and fried her whispy fur, we couldn't meet the normal requirements of oil or candles after we instituted "No open flames" as a rule. Mom would never give up on her being or her pets. My mother's eclectic nature is just part of the holiday season) to tree trimming and gift wrapping (I already got mom's mukluks ready, it's now a matter of dad's vegan cook book.) Visiting grandpa Ernie and grandma Barb and attending the memorial mass on Epiphany

(my grandma Virginia was born January 6, 1935 and she was a much loved member of the community. She has also been one of my first advocates for me to be treated like a normal child and not let my unknown diagnosis keep me from making friends. Up until they found out when I was 14, my parents bounced from doctor to doctor asking "What's wrong with our baby?!" Numerous doctors examined me and some gave weird diagnoses and for the most part each answer was unique and some came to the mystery conclusion "We are unsure of what's wrong with your daughter." But judging by my grandmother, she was fierce for an advocate for me, even if she was told there wasn't anything wrong, she was the type of person who stood up for the defenseless)

Should I care, or should I give up on the 31 years I completed with my parents and their families and shut myself out from them and whoever bumps into me in ShopRite? I mean George already had someone and my father brazenly mentioned it, breaking my heart. I also dealt with a crappy year with two painful first experiences with wasp stings and empty gas tanks.

I better sit on this. The month is half over and the year is about 96% done with.

"There are some obstacles that cannot be removed with a mere show of force."
-King of Atlantis, as portrayed by Leonard Nimoy, Atlantis: The Lost Empire
Theorist
#4292 Old 15th Dec 2018 at 5:23 AM
Nobody loves me. Nobody asks me shit about my time on the other side of the fucking planet was. My family ignores me, my friends do the same. And nobody on this site gives a shit so why do I post this other than to vent my frustration at the world and how much I want to shoot myself. Oh don't judge me google user. Go fuck yourself and die in a burning car crash where your charred body is discovered by fire crew. Yeah I said it because no one else has the balls to.

/wɒt Iz lʌv?/
/beɪbi dəʊnt həːt miː/
/dəʊnt həːt miː/
/nəʊ mɔː/
Scholar
#4293 Old 15th Dec 2018 at 6:30 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by HarVee
Nobody loves me. Nobody asks me shit about my time on the other side of the fucking planet was. My family ignores me, my friends do the same. And nobody on this site gives a shit so why do I post this other than to vent my frustration at the world and how much I want to shoot myself. Oh don't judge me google user. Go fuck yourself and die in a burning car crash where your charred body is discovered by fire crew. Yeah I said it because no one else has the balls to.


@HarVee I care hun. I've often wondered what's been happening with you and sometimes I've asked through Max, just so that I don't possibly become a pest or something. Unload anything you want to tell onto me if you like. I know it probably means nada, but I wanted to offer anyway.

Moved to Tumblr.
Truth will not fear scrutiny.
Alchemist
#4294 Old 15th Dec 2018 at 7:02 PM Last edited by PANDAQUEEN : 15th Dec 2018 at 8:46 PM.
I never liked getting into heated arguments with friends. I never liked arguments in general. The only thing that I would ask of a friend would be to see me on the same level. I would do likewise. I don't want to spend our friendship arguing over who is right and who is wrong.

I never liked relationships that mess with me. I don't like people toying with my heart. I find it hard to be able to make friends when relationships on any level just fall apart.

This has gone on for the majority of my life, starting in preschool, before the Internet came into play. Either way, whether I had friends IRL or online, I could never keep a relationship going beyond school as I was moved constantly or past a certain time as an adult.

I ABSOLUTELY HATE THIS PROBLEM!

I know it is more than just my shortcomings. I do everything I can to make it work. It seemed like everyone else and everything else didn't work in return. I think the only thing that worked was trying to stay in school.

I hate to say it: I have to talk with the agency. In Spring, I will go to the Vocational Rehabilitation Agency and ask to try again...providing my teeth are fixed in March.

"There are some obstacles that cannot be removed with a mere show of force."
-King of Atlantis, as portrayed by Leonard Nimoy, Atlantis: The Lost Empire
Page 172 of 172
Back to top