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|14th Jun 2010, 03:10 AM||#26|
Sue to Emma in Madonna: "You don't deserve the power of Madonna. Simply put, you have all the sexuality of all those pandas down at the zoo who refuse to mate."
Sue to Kurt in Laryngitis: "You know what, I checked out of our conversation about a minute back, so good luck with your troubles, and I'm gonna make it a habit not to stop and talk to students because this has been a colossal waste of my time."
Sue to Will in Journey: "Your hair looks like a briar patch. I keep expecting racist, animated Disney characters to pop up and start singing about living on the bayou."
Kurt: She changes her look faster than Britt changes sexual partners.
Brittany: It's true.
Kurt about Rachel in Hairography: "Rachel manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time."
Quinn: You wanna name our daughter Jack Daniels? It's a girl.
Puck: Okay, fine. Jackie Daniels.
Puck from Mashups: "It was a message from God: Rachel was a hot Jew and the good lord wanted me to get into her pants."
|18th Dec 2010, 01:55 AM||#27|
Anything with Sue or April (that drunk lady).
Sue: Iron tablet? It keeps your strength up when you menstruate.
Will: I don't menstruate.
Sue: Neither do I.
Sue: I got a satellite interview... That's lingo for an interview, via satellite.
Sue: I'll often yell at homeless people: 'Hey, how is that homelessness working out for you? Try not being homeless for once.'
Terri: I'm the new school nurse.
Will: But you don't have any training.
Terri: Please, Will, it's a public school.
Finn: I came up with the best baby name of all-time: drizzle.
Sue: I, for one, think intimacy has no place in a marriage. Walked in on my parents once and it was like seeing two walruses wrestling.
Sue: You think this is hard? Try [insert random problem here]. Now that's hard.
Emma: If we were to rank crushable teachers in this school, you'd be number-one with a bullet.
Sue: While they were in there, I told them to go ahead and yank out those tear ducts - wasn't using them.
Lady: Who do you think I am?
Sue: That's a very good question, because I've forgotten both your names.
Sue: You two should be wetting yourselves with shame.
Sue: (holding hair) I'm gonna send this to the victims of Hurricane Katrina, so they can use it to plug the holes in their trailers.
April: I haven't had a drink in 45 minutes.
Will: The liquor cabinet is off limits.
April: No worries. I brought my own.
April: Will Schuester!? I just had a sex dream about you.
Sue: I haven't had a solid meal since 1987.
Sue: I never understood how hard it is to get laughed at, especially in slow motion.
Sue: Nobody quits the Cheerios. You either die or I kick you off.
|24th Jan 2011, 06:20 PM||#28|
Brittany/Britney was full of brilliant quotes, but these made me lol the most.
Sue: It's a Britney Spears sex riot!
Figgins: Students that ate the ravioli today and are not up to date on their tetanus shot should see the school nurse immediately.
Sue: This school is a powder keg of sexual deviance, William. In my office I have a chair with a naked butt sweat stain to prove it.
|23rd Feb 2011, 10:57 PM||#29|
*Rachel kisses Blaine in the middle of the coffee shop*
Blaine: O.O.... Yep. I'm gay.
|2nd May 2011, 10:20 PM||#30|
About time to revive this thread, with a few quotes from A Night of Neglect...
Sandy: You're hunky and I'm what they call predatory gay.
Sandy: You just got poked. Poked by the Pink Dagger.
Dustin: I'm handsome, I'm good looking and I'm easy on the eyes. Also, I'm gorgeous. This hairline is 85% my own and my sperm count is off the charts. Let me tell you something about Will Schuester. That guy has tiny baby hands. Seriously, it's weird. Once I saw him try and pick up a Big Mac, he couldn't do it. He had to eat it layer by layer. Teeny, tiny, wee baby hands.
|11th May 2011, 09:17 PM||#31|
"Prom Queen" awesomes:
Lauren: I look like a lemon meringue pie.
Brittany: I think you look delicious.
Kurt: There is absolutely nothing off-the-rack suitable for the young, fashionable man in Ohio!
Finn: Dude, that rocks! It's like gay Braveheart!
Burt: I don't like it.
(LOVED this entire scene, BTW. But Finn just made the whole starting dialogue - nothing, IMHO, demonstrates just how great his brotherly relationship with Kurt has progressed than this.)
Finn: It's one of the good things about being in Glee club. You really get to know your way about a cummerbund.
Jesse: Now, they say that the best time to start a business is in a recession. I don't know why, or even what a recession is, but it's my understanding that we're in one.
Sue: Let me get this straight. I just threatened you, and you just told me what you really want. You're the worst POW ever! John McCain is rolling over in his grave!
Santana: As soon as we get to New York, I'm bailing to live in a lesbian colony. Or Tribeca.
Rachel: I should be mad that I got slapped in the face. However, I appreciate the drama.
|17th Jul 2011, 11:04 AM||#32|
Join Date: May 2008
BRITTANY: This relationship is really confusing for me.
SANTANA: Breakfast is confusing for you.
BRITTANY: Well, sometimes itís sweet and sometimes itís salty. Like, what if I have eggs for dinner, then what is it?
SANTANA: Hold up. Could we all just get real here for a second? I hear that Rachelís got a bit of a schnoz. I mean, I wouldnít know because, like Medusa, I try to avoid eye contact with her. But can we all just stop lying about how there arenít things that we wouldnít change about ourselves? I mean, Iím sure that Samís been at the doctorís office and rifled through pamphlets on mouth reduction. Iíll bet Artieís thought about getting his legs removed since heís not really using them anyways. And Iím definitely sure that Tinaís looked into getting an eye de-slanting.
All from Born This Way episode
|21st Jan 2012, 01:13 AM||#33|
At risk of being labelled a "Necromancer"... I had to put one of the best scenes from "Yes/No":
Artie - "I've been thinking, Mr Shue. The girls are going to try and neuter you with this
Mr. Shue - "My what?"
Artie - "So modest. You have rock star hips, Mr. Shue."
Mike - "It's true. Mick Jagger hips!" *starts swinging his hips*
Artie - "Yeah. Unleash the moves we've been practicing on
Mr. Shue - "Huh?" *looks up to see the disco ball and his face goes alarmed*
|30th Jan 2012, 08:41 PM||#34|
In The Substitute:
Santana: What would you know about Cee Lo, cos you're like, forty?
Holly Holliday: Top forty, sweet cheeks!
(that's probably my favourite line ever)
(along with this one)
Santana: oh please, I've had mono so many times it turned into stereo!
"If the human brain was simple enough to understand, we'd be too simple to understand it."
"Some things I cannot change, but till I try I'll never know."