Satan rises from the earth and rains meteorites at your cute little church destroying an artifact of Medieval or post-medieval history, which strangely home onto you crushing you and your place of residence.

I was changing my priorities in life from sex to alcohol when…

a divine intervention occurred, and the lord strikes the glass of alcohol out of your hand; unfortunately for you, it was a drink that I mixed and so the exceedingly high alcohol content cause it to explode' the shards of glass were cast into the air and through your skull; killing you instantly.

(I didn't mean you should make alcohol your priority, I meant you should make enjoying life and the people you share it with the priority. I only mentioned the alcohol because I like to get together with my friends and sit around drinking and generally having a good time, we're not really into clubbing, so after a meal together we break out the booze and have a laugh. I just happen to like the taste of pretty much every drink on offer; especially vodka, tequila, and sourz, mixed together in one glass)

I was out driving in the storm when...

I know fergus, I meant it jokily.

It ended and you didn't expect that, so you gave up on life, picked up your suitcase and walked with the grim reaper into paradise.

I was dying when.

you died. The End.

I was out delivering Christmas presents with my younger brother when...

Killjoy. You have been cleared from existsnce for your crimes.

I was rogpramming wehn.

the computer decides to program you - you get a virus and die of robotic syphilis.

meanwhile i was attending your funeral when...

the zombie appocalypse caused by robotic syphillis begun. Being at the funeral meant that you stood very little chance of escape.

Meanwhile I was out driving in the dark when...

I ate a taco from taco bell, and since there isnt such a thing in the UK, godly powers devastated your vicinity to make one, so I could make sense. (Ykno)

I was belling a taco...

...when you discovered there was a mouse in the taco that had somehow caught robotic syphilis and it ate your face off. :D
I was on the moon, trying to escape from the plague of mouse-zombies when...

I was shot by a cloud

A person farted near me

And you were gassed to death.

I wrote Down on my French paper that I was a pro monopoly player and...

You accidentally opened a portal to another dimension, and 2000 kittens fell out of it, crushing you to death. The kittens were fine, though.

I was messing around with the space-time continuum in an attempt to return the kittens to their home dimension when...

the kittens got bored and you became the scratching post.

I was drawing in my notebook when...

I found my notebook was actually one of the book of monsters from HP and it ate your face... face-first.

I was stalking my cat's friend's mother's owner's daughter's friend's friend when...

All the confusion killed you

I was singing my favorite song when

you couldnt hit the note and you were so out of tune the dogs and cats in your naighbourhood started attacking you to silence your monstrocity of a voice!

I was in catholic sunday school not listening to the nun /teacher when...

You died. Randomly.

I was eating a pot noodle when...

the noodle said 'ow! stop hurting me!' it scared the shit out of you and you shat your pants and died of embarrassment sims 4 style...

i was at prom when all of a suddenly...

you fell into a comma that killed you

P.S. I am a good singer

I was just dancing

that you felt on your .....
i was buying the rest of my sims 3 collection

When the shelf fell on me.

I was ice skating...

When a unicorn made of ice materialized and shot you with a laser.
I was freaking out over nothing when...

you became a statistic in the path of destruction caused by a slow moving silent giant sinkhole, you should have looked behind you more.

I somehow appeared in a farm field

During the zombie apocalypse

I was talking to my mum...

when she got amensia and thought you were a burgular trying to kill her and slaughtered you with a frying pan.

I was masturbating...