I really really wish you would put this particular sim (if not all of the Scumthorpes) up somewhere for download. I'd love to have him in my game.

Yes, he has an interesting face and is almost beautiful. All he needs is a different hair. Share please! I love your families' stories, MinghamSmith; they're always very lulzy

Actually, with a different hairstyle, he does look a bit like Dexter, doesn't he?

Or the Ice Truck Killer, for that matter.

(I'd post a picture, but it'd be a huge spoiler for anyone who hasn't seen the first season of Dexter yet and wants to)

He's carrying a HAMMER? Don't tell me that's the same hammer from the "Bash with Hammer" option from Dexter the Bear...

It is. Guilty as charged.

(It didn't work, and I didn't expect it to)

Amusingly, though, upon getting the "children can't kill, hold your grudge until he's a teenager" message, he immediately responded with this priceless expression of disappointment at being unable to make anything die:

"Once I learn to walk, you will all learn to fear me."

On a related note, I tried that again more recently with him as a child. Again, it does actually work for screenshot purposes- he holds the weapon correctly and walks normally with it for a bit until the error message displays:

I'm kind of surprised, actually. Usually, this sort of thing inevitably leads to that horrifying stretching glitch, or some other graphics problem-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

A thousand times, yes. The main reason I read this thread is to hear new stories about the scumthorpe family.

Every time my Sim's husband does laundry, he will pick up all the dirty clothes, set them down on the floor and leaves them there.

Teenage Sim was going to take romance photo in photo booth, but then different girl (also romance relationship) went in there......

To keep things from getting too Scumthorpe-centred, allow me to introduce another recurring comedic figure in my town.

Ever looked at the pink/red skintone slider and wondered what you're meant to do with it? I suppose there are many ways to utilize it depending on what you want out of the game. I know, for instance, that it'll probably be used for some fairies in Supernatural, and that a lot of people have already used it to make what I've seen referred to as Berry Sweet sims.

Being a rather more cynical person with a seemingly-inherent predisposition towards black humour, however, I made this instead:


Meet Malphas the Eternal. He lives in an abandoned concrete bunker on the outskirts of town, has a name nicked from Collin de Plancy's Dictionnaire Infernal and yet still somehow manages to be both the local Casanova and the sim with the highest celebrity rank in the area. No accounting for taste, I guess.


4-STAR CELEBRITY RATING, PATHETIC MORTALS! COUNT THEM! COUNT MY STARS!

On most days, you can usually find him strutting around town boasting, starting fires and hitting on anything without a Y chromosome. Occasionally, though, he does let his sensitive side show through all the swagger and hellfire:


JUST BECAUSE I COME FROM THE NINTH CIRCLE OF HELL DOESN'T MEAN I CAN'T CRY AT WEDDINGS


EVEN IF I DO SPEND HALF THE TIME STARING AT THE BRIDE'S ASS

...Ok, maybe not.

So you may be wondering, with all these bizarre inhuman entities running around my version of Sunset Valley even before the release of Supernatural, what happened to all the EA premades?

Uh, yeah, about that...

Let's take Lisa Bunch as a case study. Like many unfortunate sims in the aftermath of Late Night being released, Lisa Bunch was arbitrarily converted into a vampire by story progression despite being part of an extended Brady Bunch parody and therefore probably the least vampiric person in existence. She then ran across the aforementioned demonic counterpart to Don Lothario, had a one-night stand and was apparently somewhat careless about it.


Because three days later, this happened.

Immediately afterwards, though, I discovered that the rapidly-declining needs of pregnant sims do not mix well with vampirism. At all.

Why? Well, in the space of about 5 seconds after giving birth she lost control of her bladder, hit 0 Thirst and instantly crumbled to dust...


...leaving a bemused half-demon newborn stranded in a puddle of his own dead mother's ashes and wee.

And so Lucifer Bunch, aka Doombaby came into the world.

Aww, what a cute little hellspawn! Look how much he takes after his dad!

Of course, Doombaby wasn't an isolated incident. At least four more red, imp-like half-demon toddlers have appeared in Sunset Valley since, three of them being a set of triplets born to an already-married woman with a human husband who dislikes children. One can't help but be concerned for the future of the local genepool- due to a combination of this and my stubborn insistence on including alien babies several months prior to the release of Seasons, the town's human birthrate has almost totally collapsed and been overtaken about four times by the number of inhuman/mutant births.

When the only human babies born in recent memory were all Scumthorpes. you know your community is doomed.

I just had the most HILARIOUS glitch in my game. Instead of a baby chime after my sims woohooed, the game played the sound it reserves for the toilet clogging or the computer breaking. Makes me wonder what happened in bed there...

I can only assume the condom broke. I suggest naming the resulting baby Accident, Mistake or ERROR in honour of this rather telling glitch.

I had my Sims move to a new house today. From the time the Father hung up the phone till they arrived at the new house, the girl (child) was screaming and cheering the entire way/time.

Whoopsie. Name the kid Whoopsie.

My Sim ordered pizza. The pizza guy got out of his car and did not have a pizza in his hand. He was holding his hand out as if he was carrying a pizza though. He stands on their porch for about half and hour, charges them for pizza (which he never delivered), then leaves.

Whoopsie if it's a girl, ERROR for a boy. Because eventually, you can give him a big black beard and make this happen:

Today my pregnant was taking a shower. I wasn't paying attention because I was watching her (teen) daughter doing something, forgot what. The woman was pregnant with her third child. She gets out of the shower and doesn't put on any clothing. She then goes and practices chess, in the living room where the entire family was; she played for awhile then went to sculpt. She was completely naked the entire time.

Mingham Smith, please tell me you have a blog or something, because this is all just too funny, and I needed a good laugh.

When my Sims went to visit his girlfriend, this is what he saw on the front porch when he came up.

Looks like a friendly family.

Your sim must have ordered from the Neverland pizzeria!

Seriously, Mingham, you need a story blog.

I've heard it can be difficult to get comfortable. If it was her third, perhaps she was tired of taking guff about keeping up appearances.

OTOH, perhaps it wasn't even related to the pregnancy. In the words of the prophet St. Alanis: "I recommend walking around naked in your living room."

My Sim (same one I posted the photo of visiting his girlfriend) likes to say a certain word while playing chess on his computer. I don't know what it means in Simlish, but in English the word is "frog".

Ok I know I was crazy but I married off a Gordon Ramsay sim (made by the wonderful Lady Frontbum he's here if anyone wants him http://www.ladyfrontbum.com/?p=75) to my Diva singer ... His idea of fun is basically to walk up to total strangers to beat them up, slap them silly or generally verbally abuse them. He tried this on my Diva when they first met, and you know what she did? She slapped him back! They are now happily married with twins and he can't keeps his hands off her .. Ain't love amazing? Upside is the kids are surprisingly well rounded .. Downside .. they both look like Gordon ...

*waves lighter and sings The Power Of Love*