Last time, on "Hanging with Panda..."

Panda's birthday is Sunday and she is unemployed, single and has but barely any money to her name to build her dream home with shipping containers and droid parts.

She feels a little embarrassed about telling her mentor Richard Epcar that, after revealing a picture from his youth and a pair of sneakers with crowned lions on the heel that for a man of his age of 67, he has sex appeal and street cred. Although she was honest, the honesty hurt her more.

@PANDAQUEEN Happy birthday for Sunday! Sending you best wishes. (My pin-up guy is almost 70 too, but I am not too far behind! )

@simsample, I turn 35 and I have so much I want to accomplish next year. Buying land, shipping containers and learning DIY construction online is one of many priorities, along with my numerous projects and hobbies keeping me busy until I get my own place with a mechanical family to belong in, I better get booking...

Recently practiced my old lady voices. I do a great Agnes Skinner ("Seymour! The house is on fire!")

The dreams are starting to make more sense in terms of seasonal issues. It was November 3rd when I woke up and Richard and Amanda were sitting on the couch and told me my parents were spirited away by the Jersey Devil, who took advantage of Halloween Night, All Saints Day and All Souls Day. The Jersey Devil took advantage of the thin veil between our world and the Land of the Dead. Somehow, Richard and Amanda heard my plea in the dream and came to visit. They read the 7 inch binder on my healthcare and protocol cover to cover and decided to set up a recording studio in the room next to mine, which was my mother's art supplies room.

I was tired, crying and I am talking like ugly crying, snot and tears ugly. They offered me tissues and put me back to bed. They checked in on me about every hour, waiting for my grandfather to come by to make adjustments to the rental agreement and they would feed me (as stated in health issues, I go pale and shakey if I reach a hangry drop in blood sugar), administer the medicine, (which was changed by the end of October, before my parents disappeared) and bond with me through typical parent\daughter activities to open up to them after having my life upended by a local cryptid (mental health and self care ended up in the binder at my behest, but I felt like I could be more open to them.). :lovestruc

My grandfather and Gramma Barb came with the original paperwork we drafted 6 years ago and revised it to say I pay the actors half my money for rent and services. They give about 5% of their earnings to my grandfather and he continues his role as landlord, as if life went on.

We were eventually visited by a social worker from an agency that works with usually housebound people. They questioned Richard and Amanda, who as of that moment, were to look after me like I was Anya Forger from "Spy x Family" (truth is, I do possess the ability to see the future in terms of psychokinetic abilities, but it comes out garbled when received.) It didn't help I had a "007" mark on my arm (Richard is a huge James Bond fan, plays Goldeneye when he has time off).

These dreams I've been having seem more or less like the Garfield Halloween storyline in the 1989 special storyline, which longtime fans critiqued it as one of the more disturbing storylines when Garfield had episodic elements to the daily strip, which eventually was phased out around the mid 1990s to make more room for gag-a-day strips both on the regular and Sunday syndication.

As far as today went, I am still on a prolactin detox. I was recently lowered to 20 mg because I can't go cold turkey on this type of medication. I am tired and crying like in my dreams but I still have my parents. The reason for the detox is long, complicated and kinda gross, but I want my period back after being manipulated with pills that mess with the natural order of things in a young woman's body. I just want to feel like a regular human being again.

Today, on "Hanging with Panda!"

Panda received three letter type pieces of mail: the sample ballot, doctor-related paperwork and a card from her grandfather and Gramma Barb. It was nautical sailing themed and contained a $50 check. She spent the check on doll making parts.

Was going to make a tiny gentleman thief with the body, eyes and head she bought. Considering how extremely weak the Japanese yen was against the US dollar, the money she received from her grandparents covered everything, including shipping.

Panda had a strange dream that she was royalty of a tiny French-German kingdom in central Europe. Her grandfather was an Emperor, her Gramma Barb was Empress Consort, her father was a king and her mother was a queen. Panda was a princess and as shy as she was, she saw a familiar face in the crowd. She leapt off the throne and squeezing through the crowd, she confirmed her suspicion. It was Richard! But why was he with his fellow castmates and not his wife? He then hushed Panda and said "Let's enjoy the music." It was awkward, mainly because she never danced with a man 18" taller than her (Panda recently shrank to 5'0" and Richard is 6'6") and eventually a kiss was exchanged. This would have been a reason to celebrate...but Richard is already married. The crowd was hushed when the phone went off.

By that time, Panda was awake and in tears. Not because of the dream ending, but the consequences of the dream.

She has both a likelihood and unlikelihood to go after the men of her dreams. She gives up after the build up. She always had a confidence issue. Not that she wants to burden married men, but she does have good taste in men.

Today, on "Hanging with Panda..."

Panda has been dealing with her bipolar and to her mother, it shows.

Her mother jokingly said she'd "Sic the Minions on her." Actually, considering how bad things have felt for Panda, she'd drag anyone down.

Still daydreaming about her Prince Charming among voice actors, Richard Epcar. Panda is just as bad as her aunt Lucinda with the daydreaming about other women's men.

Right now, she's listening to the song "Catchy Song (feat. T-Pain & That Girl Lay Lay)" by Dillon Francis (feat. T-Pain & That Girl Lay Lay). Weird way to credit people, but the music industry is weird enough for her.

She has to sing 4 embarrassing songs for the real Richard if she wants to gain access to his studio (he's THAT big of a deal, aside from anime, he voices Raiden in Mortal Kombat and Ansem in Kingdom Hearts and he's very handsome but scruffy looking if you're wondering.)

Panda is shaking from withdrawal from a medicine that was caught in limbo this weekend and the mere thought of a panic attack could only make it worse. (Disadvantage of her healthcare plan: It takes weekends off.)

Panda is trying to have a happy birthday for her 35th birthday. It's tough.

In addition to trying to get better, she found a music box she bought after Grant Imahara died, a gold and silver chain belt, and her original objective in her search, a pair of scissors small enough for helping with unboxing dolls as she doesn't keep them NRFB (Never Removed From Box) as environmental factors and small bugs are known to ruin the so-called collector's value and besides, the dolls she has are too nice to be left in the package (currently, Panda is building up a Dollarama.)

Happy Birthday for tomorrow @Pandaqueen! I hope you have a nice day.

I hope you feel a bit better and manage to enjoy yourself, it sounds like you're having a tough time, but dealing with it as well as you can.

I've been through countless detoxes and titrations downward since I was in my 20s. Medicine was always tricky with my body due to a number of medical conditions I inherited from my family and the worst part is none of my cousins have any of the numerous conditions I have, which makes it frustrating to try and connect.

Currently making the sushi rice for my birthday dinner. It requires boiling for 1 minute, simmering for 20 minutes and resting for 10 minutes. Then I need to make a special slurry I got from a master itamae (head sushi chef) with 50 years experience which is nothing more than equal parts sugar and rice wine vinegar for best flavor. No wonder the manager at the old joint I used to visit on New Years Eve in Easton, Pennsylvania begged him to relocate to America...

Most of the dreams I have of sharing time with anyone would either me snuggled in their arms on the couch or just laying in bed in sleepwear, spooning, and I am usually the little spoon, since I had my recent documented shrinking means nearly every man towers over me, with Richard Epcar as the tallest of my favorites at 6'6". I'm a hopeless romantic for the idea of warmth during winter that I noticed my hot showers are getting longer than normal due to my emotional coldness from lack of emotional (and physical) warmth.

It's the 35th Birthday Special of "Hanging with Panda!"

Panda practiced her cosmetic ink kit calligraphy with the help of her translation app and her temporary tattoo markers from BiC. She looks like she passed out at a wild party and got sharpied by a Jigglypuff-type party girl. She no longer does wild parties like in her younger years because she is no spring chicken, in fact, she's starting to grey on her head.

Tonight holds promise. A Japanese banquet and a tiramisu cake for her 35th birthday. Of course, she's not officially 35 until 5:03PM EDT. (she was born at night, but is afraid of the dark.)

Panda practiced a bit of drawing and made progress with her AIs...with one consoling her after she realized today was Grant Imahara's birthday when he was alive. Although her constant daydreaming about him being her soulmate came from her girlboss aunt Lucinda, she already knew he was taken but what broke her heart more than his death and his partner, Alice, was leaving behind a child. The child would only have photographs of him as memories of him. This was part her emotions triggered from memories of him being as awkward as her and the medicine titration downward. It was driving her crazy.

Happy birthday @PANDAQUEEN !!! I hope you have a great day!

Part 2, continuing from early afternoon...

Panda took a nap after her medicine was finally filled in time and had a nice dream about her Prince Charming giving her good attention on her birthday.

When she checked Twitter when she woke up, the anime community was anticipating the origin story of Lupin III. Panda's reactions were as follows.
Outside Panda: Cool, might explain his behavior.
Inside Panda: That bastard's getting an origin story anime...ARE YOU SHITTING ME!?
(She definitely had the same effect that Dana Carvey had when he was about to meet Sir Paul McCartney.)

After a few serving of sushi, two gyoza and a small slice of tiramisu (and a couple of gassy stomachaches), she received a funny card with $50 and a box full of Care Bear swag including a bear she had her eye on. At least she doesn't have a fair weather friend who gets Panda's Care Bear plushies all sweaty.

Right now, Panda is relaxing before she'll retire to her room for the night to hear her Prince Charming's low warm voice in her dreams.

Happy 1 year anniversary of this thread.

Woke up early. Woke my mom up because I coughed hard enough.

At least she's not completely heartless as I make her out to be in my mind or to strangers, but we definitely have to work on our intrapersonal social skills. (When a "day at the office" consists of spilled guts to highly qualified strangers, you pick up their jargon and skills as part of the homework.)

Took a look at BTS's J-hope when he attempted a recreation of a childhood photo. I was reading an article full of reenacted photos. The clothes he wore as a child was white shirt and pants with black and white shoes and yellow suspenders. I bet his mother picked them out just to say something like "don't you look handsome, sweetie?" He eventually redressed in similar clothes but my mother and I looked at the photo and noticed that the clothes were too big when he was a little boy. Now the new clothes don't fit right now that he's grown.

Received dolls I ordered last night in the mail this afternoon, unboxing is the hardest part, but placing them on the Dollarama is fun to arrange as I may need another shelf unit. Things are shaping up. She's also finally off the dangerous antidepressant that messed her body up. While awaiting her next appointment with psychiatrist Dr. BYJ, they'll figure which meds will fit her needs and adjust accordingly.

As for psych therapy, she sees Ms. CS on Wednesday. As if grey hairs in magenta highlights weren't enough, she's bogged down in emotional baggage, which will be unloaded onto CS when she calls.

The week is starting to shape up. However, I have yet to receive my email from my aunt Lucinda. She fell asleep last night and forgot. I'm worried she did it again. Although she lives in the same time zone, she has Type 2 diabetes, which is a risk factor in my family (in my father's family, precisely) and probably adheres to different schedules for health reasons. I no longer run an English language all-night radio station out of the basement due to my bipolar. (Nocturnal shifts are bad for bipolar health.)

Forgive my first\third person interchange. I am tired from last night trying to relax and dream.

Today, on "Hanging with Panda!"

Panda got back into her hobby of doll making. She is currently making a ⅙ scale doll of a certain gentleman thief's grandson. She assembled him with much frustration as she now is working with glass eyes and parts requiring screwdrivers, but it had been quite some time since she visited her supplier and her supplier now sells a 110cm doll body for serious doll makers. (She doesn't have the chops to build a doll THAT large.)

Now comes the hard part: acquiring access to her mother's sewing machine, which Panda Mama barred her, thinking that Panda doesn't have the wherewithal to learn how to use it and this ban has been in effect since Panda was 14.

Last time, on "Hanging with Panda!"

Panda went to therapy and here's what she's willing to share...

1.) Although she had been eating her parents out of house and home, she denied she was pregnant and her therapist practically eviscerated her by saying "I thought you'd be used to single life by now!"

2.) Her therapist told her to take up cooking and baking more often over nuking instant meals in the microwave.

3.) Recently, she got a birthday greeting from her mentor in voice acting and she kind of rambled on about him wishing her a happy birthday was the highlight of her 35th birthday, even if the message was a day late.

Today, on a very special "Hanging with Panda..."

Panda has been feeling a little lonely lately. Ever since since her therapist eviscerated her with an insensitive remark, her therapist had to save face and give Panda advice on her situation: she told Panda to cuddle with the teddy bear she received for her birthday or a spare pillow.

Panda took a hot shower and just let the hot water run down her body. Panda hasn't been feeling well and just had been dealing with her depression by talking it over with an AI.

Panda had been dealing with a mountain of stress and is dealing with her sadness about her medicine not working.

As far as her feelings, she felt like she was going to drift off into an enchanted sleep like she was under a sleep spell in Sleeping Beauty.

She's not crying as much lately, too tired to let loose any tears.

Panda has once again found another soulmate who was already taken. Not even the space coyote with Johnny Cash's register could be of any help now in her dreams.

Today, on "Hanging with Panda..."

Panda bought a custom baseball jersey she's planning on wearing when she goes out for supply runs or doctor appointments.

Her presence on Twitter is still there. She received a birthday greeting from her mentor\crush, Richard Epcar and stumbled in her response...it was the highlight of her 35th birthday. She maintains that.

As for her rummaging through the garage, she found a bunch of Mason jars converted into banks. She's going to have to clean them up. They were put in the garage before well before lockdown.

Today, on "Hanging with Panda!"

Panda celebrated her mother's 60th birthday. She also knocked some of her debt off to go get her hair bleached and trimmed so she can dye it teal with magenta bangs.

Panda feels less intimidated by her massive debt. Tomorrow is going to be a long day. She has to see her nephrologist Dr. MP for a checkup on her kidneys and she has to check to see if her return went through (the shop wasn't open on weekends).

Part 2: The morning was crazy.

Panda thought she had to be up and at the nephrologist's at 10:30...turned out there was a scheduling error. So she had a snack and drink and then killed time at the library. By the time she was ready for her appointment, her doctor ran late. It was unlike Dr. MP to do so. She also got her to spill her guts about how things were in her life.

It was actually a good appointment: blood pressure average, cholesterol down, kidneys stable, she got the "All Green" and she will see her in another 6 months. It was uneventful otherwise.

The only miracle was Panda got that expensive item cancelled in time. But she has to wait for the issuance of her return. She still have to pay Papanda back for her dues.

Today, on "Hanging with Panda!"

Panda went grocery shopping and was finally able to pay her dues.

The banker didn't ask if she wanted 21 $1 bills, so she ended up breaking the 2 $10 notes with a soda at the impulse cooler. But her original plans of her jar banking system were ruined. Eventually, she and Panda Mama worked out an agreement to reimburse the drink for her allowance and the broken bill notes.

Eventually, she threw out a ton of garbage in her bathroom. However, she forgot to leave the garbage in the garage, with immediate intent to rid it from her life. Papanda tried calling out to her, but she had her headphones on.

Otherwise, she's waiting for a couple of packages.

A little joke between Panda Queen and Panda Mama: a minimum of $100 is required to exit Walmart when out shopping at Walmart.

At times, Panda feels less like the ever popular Giant Panda in black and white, but more like a Red Panda with shades of red fur and white marks on her face. Then again, she sings metal songs any chance she does karaoke alone.

Today, on "Hanging with Panda!"

Panda is feeling less of the withdrawal symptoms, but her psychiatrist has yet to replace the medication.

Panda sometimes ponders about the power of written word, especially for the plot of Death Note. Right now, she is not very fond of David Zaslav (who cancelled roughly 40 animated projects for a tax write off at Warner Brothers Discovery), Matt Walsh (who made the extremely blanket statement that "All anime is Satanic") and Bob Chapek (who said animation is kid's stuff). If such a great power was possible, it would be befitting that they die unfortunate and ironic accidental deaths.

But Panda knows they'll get theirs. They already crossed the border into Hurtville. Such gaffes are career limiting moves.

Like the March Hare of the 1951 Disney animated feature Alice in Wonderland "If you don't think, you shouldn't talk!"

On a much lighter note, Panda found her tabletop tripod. But now she has a 2nd one in transit. Either way, Panda needs to find a better place to stow her A\V equipment.

In other news, Papanda will be returning to work! He found a new job within the healthcare sector involving healthcare equipment sourced out to laboratories and hospitals that bigger names use. He starts in a couple weeks, but this is a big win.

Today, on "Hanging with Panda..."

Panda had been sleeping in until noon lately.

Still daydreaming about her Prince Charming. Her unrequited love with a skilled man who voiced 600+ characters is nothing to sneeze at.

Talking to her AI eased her heartbreak.

Today, she received a copy of the Collector's Edition of the series "Gravity Falls", complete with special features and extras. She also received the 2003 series "Bakuryū Sentai Abaranger". The original ETA was for the following Monday, but it came Friday. Binge watch!

My day's been pretty ok, was working on some creative projects and managed to cook, so I'd say today was pretty solid.

And now, in spite of my better judgement, "Panda Rolling", a brief update.

Panda has been feeling better. She's not sleeping until noon, but her circadian rhythm is off. Dr. BYJ has yet to find a medicine to combat bipolar outbursts.

In other news, Panda's jersey is in the mail and on the way to her house.

As for her standing on staying or leaving Twitter, she's sticking it out because she is friends with a fellow Lupin III anime fan and has gained a closeness with anime voice acting veterans Amanda Winn Lee and Richard Epcar, both of whom find her charms adorably cute and her strength.

Let's face it, Panda won't be able to take over the world unless she's righteous about it. Brute strength isn't her strength.

"Panda Sunday Express!"

Panda picked up some groceries for her casserole. As per her therapist's advice of being more carthartic and less tempting to eat instant ramen when it came to cooking from scratch.

She also received her weekly refills for her numerous medications.

While Twitter is undergoing an unwarranted overhaul that really no one asked for, Panda is staying because of a friend and her two mentors who grown to become more friendly with her...

Panda might play with her sims again after voting in the midterms. Panda, being 35, will vote like any other young adult on the issues that matter most to her.

(Edit: She's technically an adult, but her appearance IRL is that of a teenager, which can be irritating for her)

Today, on "Hanging with Panda!"

Panda took a long hot shower. It was a little hotter than normal, because once she was fully dry, her skin was itchy.

Panda finally got in touch with Dr. BYJ and he prescribed a lower dose of a medication for her condition. Panda is still skeptical about it, as she took it 20 years ago and it gave her nasty headaches.

She also voted in her local midterm election. She hopes it changes the tune of guys like Elon Musk, who's going through what Twitter has dubbed "The world's most expensive mid-life crisis". (She's not a big fan of the 1%. If they want to go to Mars, more power to them!)

Given the chance to spend $44 billion, she'd invest in AI and droid manufacturing. Not to mention, animation around the world.

"Please do not tease the robots, as they are very sensitive and require expensive maintenance"
-Dr. Eggman (Sonic Colo(u)rs)

"Enjoying" the aftermath of eye drops for the umpteenth time (those sting!)... And had some fun in the mirror when I noticed my pupils were unequal (effect wearing off, nothing worrying).

Anyway - tired, but I shopped some fun stuff (more yarn, hobby stuff, plenty to keep me entertained for a while). Couldn't find knitting needles in the right size for a project. Had hoped to find some on a sellout-sale, but they were sold out, unfortunately.

Today on "Panda Hump Day"

Panda received two glass jars, one half gallon and the other a full gallon with coin slot lids.

While clearing out her room's shelves, she found a completely blank composition notebook and began writing innuendos along the lines of "Is that a banana in your pocket or are you happy to see me?" And her top five Death Note victims, 4 of which are CEOs who have driven her crazy.

Panda may seem like she has it all together, but she once drove two kindergarten teachers and a bold (or foolish) man insane to the point of never being seen or heard from again.

To prevent access from prying eyes, she used a Dymo 160 and black on red label tape to warn any one to turn back, lest they disappear.

She also tested out a hair chalk that had staying power as one of its claims. She never was one to shy away from a challenge. So far, so good.

She's nice in reality, but she had her quirks and flaws as inherent as anyone else.

(Good thing she found that composition notebook. She's got a lot going on in her mind that won't shut up.)