Tiffani tossed the candy wrappers into her trashcan and then flopped onto the floor, trying to figure out either 1) how to get away from her family and preferably be adopted by a better family or 2) how not to go completely insane when Nikki showed up. Unfortunately, she found herself unable to create a plan for either.

“I hate when Nikki comes to visit,” she muttered. “Mom and Dad think she’s so great, just because she won, like, a gajillion beauty pageants, and was super-popular and skinny, and she was head cheerleader and prom queen. ‘Tiffani, you should be more like Nikki! You need to lose weight!’ Well, f**k you both. I don‘t need to be a clone of Miss Perfect. I‘d rather be myself.” She looked astonished by her own words. “…Myself. Do I even have much of a self?” she muttered, having a rare moment of total introspection. “I joined the dance team and cheerleading squad to make them happy. I hung out with the ‘right people’ to make them happy. Hell, I even grew my hair long, just to make them happy.”


She stood up and walked over to her vanity, peering at her reflection. She narrowed her eyes slightly, and she uttered, in a low voice, “I’m taking my ‘self’ back. And no one’s going to stop me. Not even--”

Just then, there was a knock at her bedroom door. “Tiffani, dear, you have a phone call,” her mother said.

“Yes, Mother, I’m coming,” Tiffani responded, immediately becoming docile and obedient again. She opened her door, and her mother handed her the phone, then walked away. Tiffani shut the door, and then held the receiver to her ear.


“Hello?” she said.

“Hey, Tiff, this is AJ,” the voice on the other side said.

“Hi, AJ.”

“A whole bunch of us are going to go see a movie-- Ophelia, Charise, Emily, S, and a bunch of Charise’s friends. Do you want to come?”

Tiffani groaned. Murphy’s Law. The same day I have the chance to do something fun, I have family crap to do. “Sorry, AJ,” she said. “I have a family thing to do. My sister Nikki’s coming to visit. She’s pregnant… again. And she’s hoping it’s a little boy.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” AJ said. “Well, if you have some free time later on, call me, and we can do something.”

“Sure,” Tiffani replied. “I guess I’ll see you whenever.”

“Yeah. Bye.”

“Bye,” Tiffani muttered, turning off the phone. She walked out of her room and over to the living room, where she put the phone back on the charger.


“Are you going to wear that?” her mother asked, looking her over. “You’re going to shame us! Go put on something else.”

“It’s just Nikki,” Tiffani replied.

“Young lady, you will not talk back to me. Now, you will march back into your room, and you will put on something nice. Your sister is going to be here soon, and I will not let her seeing you wearing that casual clothing. Even Becky is being a better daughter than you! Now go change your clothes!”

“Yes, Mother, I will go change my clothes immediately,” Tiffani responded, lowering her head.